


Unjustifiable

by embarrassingresultofmyfreetime



Series: And They Were Happy AU [3]
Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Doctor Who AU, Established Relationship, Happy Ending, O struggles with his identity, Sad with a Happy Ending, Spydoc, The Master is on his last life so he becomes O for real au, Thoschei, and uses elements from the previous stories, as per usual: rated T for emotional turmoil, but do whatever you want there's nothing I can do about it, part 3 of the 'Dinner and a Show' series, the doctor is ace, they're all linked it should be clear enough, this can be read by itself but it fits in with the series, this kinda accidentally turned into a full story
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-21
Updated: 2020-05-12
Packaged: 2021-03-02 00:40:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 23,870
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23766283
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/embarrassingresultofmyfreetime/pseuds/embarrassingresultofmyfreetime
Summary: O- having no recollection of his actions as 'The Master'- returns to being Earth's Horizon Watcher.O is proud of his work and he cherishes the Doctor's frequent visits, but it's becoming increasingly apparent that she's been keeping more secrets about his past than he had theorized.To make matters worse, the arrival of an advanced species of aliens on his doorstep brings with it a whole new plethora of problems. Something terrifying resurfaces when O hears they're searching for a Tardis and things go terribly wrong.
Relationships: The Doctor/The Master (Doctor Who), Thirteenth Doctor/O (the Master), Thirteenth Doctor/The Master (Dhawan)
Series: And They Were Happy AU [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1684924
Comments: 72
Kudos: 90





	1. Identity and Trust

**Author's Note:**

> Reading P1 and P2 will give this a lot more context. If you've already read them: you're amazing thank you!!  
> This is P3 for organizational purposes tbh.  
> This was SO MUCH FUN to write and a hassle to edit lol.  
> Enjoy, bookmark so you hear about the update, sign in and kudos please, and comment!!

O often acted oblivious, but he was by no means an idiot.

He loved the Doctor. He loved everything about her.

He didn't mind that she showed up inconsistently or sometimes rolled in at midnight acting like it had been years when O had seen her the weekend prior.

He could live with the fact that she would always refuse to take him with her on her travels, even though he maintained that she needed someone to watch her back.

All the stories and messages and late calls and visits were already more than he could ever ask for- but there was a lingering feeling that he couldn't shake.

A voice that asked him if she was around him so much because he loved her back, or if she didn't trust him.

Most of the time he could ignore it, especially when the Doctor was there to make it all easier; but sometimes he couldn't.

She had been acting different ever since an event he couldn't remember. And re-reading the letter 'explaining' what happened never made more sense than the time before.

It told him that part of his memories had been wiped for his own safety, but the more he reread it the less he became convinced it was from the Doctor. He had assumed it was- who else could have done it? But he wasn't so sure anymore.

That same day he had awoken with a package for the Doctor. She had told him it was a goodbye from an old friend. Was it possible that O had known this other friend? This other Time Lord? If not, why would he entrust O with such an important message?

Ever since then, the Doctor visited more frequently than ever and it made him wonder what he could have possibly done in that missing time to make her act this way. She was always honest with him- when it was possible- but this was something else.

And that wasn't all. He could excuse her strange actions. Perhaps the death of her friend had simply left her lonelier than before. Or any number of other things could have happened to her while she was away to bring about the kind of change.

No, the most frustrating thing was the little clues he had begun to find ever since he lost that gap of time.

He once found a poetry book he couldn't remember buying. He could have sworn he'd never seen it before, but different sections of various poems were underlined or circled. Sometimes there were even words written in a purple pen that sat in a cup holder on his desk, one he couldn't recall ever using.

"My name is Ozymandias, King of Kings;

Look on my Works, ye Mighty, and despair!"

He read over the words.

On a different poem he very simply found the words: "Should I kill this guy?" Written in the margins.

But, almost in response, a note on a different poem by the same author a few pages later read, "No, I guess he's good enough."

O had chalked it up to having bought the book at a second hand store- the copy was certainly beat up enough to be plausible- which someone had written in with great frustration before he had obtained it. Yes, that would make sense.

But there was more. He found a folder labeled 'The Doctor' in large beautiful writing which had fallen behind a cabinet. There was nothing in it except a long string of numbers and letters written on the inside.

He found that he already had them memorized, but simply added it and the poem book to a desk drawer and did his best to ignore their existence.

Still, there was more. There was always more. There was the Doctor's companions' deep distrust in him. He could see it in their eyes, but he had no idea what had buried it so deeply there. Like Ryan's words: "the others said not to trust you" and "I know you don't want her dead or you would have done it already". If he only knew what he'd done...maybe he could fix it.

He always found a way to push the speculation from his mind.

If his memory had been wiped in the first place, it was best that he didn't remember.

... It must be.

Or else the Doctor would tell him.

... Wouldn't she?

O didn't enjoy questioning these things. They were poisonous to his mind. There was probably a reasonable explanation for them, but was he willing to gamble his life on it?

O shook his head to expel the upsetting thoughts and did what he did- an embarrassing amount- when this kind of feeling struck him. He put on the bracelet the Doctor had made him and busied himself with a distraction.

Usually he liked to build things or at least tinker with them, for it was his favorite hobby. He often tuned up his 'Horizon Watcher', as the Doctor always called it, but sometimes he made other things he didn't tell her about.

He was sure he would get an earful from her about messing with advanced technology, but he could easily find something fascinating enough to hold his interest from MI6's systems to UNIT's or TORCHWOOD's old files. There were plentiful blueprints from reverse engineered alien technology that had been left on Earth and O enjoyed reconstructing different items even if he didn't have all the pieces to make them work. Either way, it was a good exercise and he was getting ridiculously good at it.

This time around, he didn't have to bother searching for a new project.

One of the out-of-place things he had found while cleaning- like the poetry book and the file folder- was blueprints to some kind of shrinking device. He had no idea why it had been tucked away in the back of a storage bin of papers, but there he'd found it: folded up and water damaged from something being spilled on it.

Nonetheless, he diligently pieced together what the device required and completed it without much trouble. He additionally endeavored to add a reverse switch.

Just as a cure for his boredom, he aimed it at a kitchen chair. The diagram had said something ‘Compression Device’ so he wasn't entirely sure what to expect.

A moment later, he had a tiny 1/50th scale of the item sitting on the floor. O hurried over to the tiny model, delighted to see his excellent work in action.

He flipped the switch to enlarge it back to it's normal size.

Surprisingly, it worked without a problem.

He tossed the hand-held device back and forth between his hands. It felt pretty good, but it didn't have much of a purpose. He couldn't possibly give it to MI6 because he was sure they would find a way to weaponize it. Still, it could be practical.

He wondered how well it would work on other types of things and decided to test it out on something living. He stepped out to his porch and identified a spider scurrying across it. He zapped it and was a little disappointed to find that the creature didn't move when shrunk. It simply just sat there like a tiny figurine.

He flipped the reverse switch and leapt back as the tiny creature exploded before it reached full size. He winced at the sight.

'Okay... so... maybe not living things just yet. But it worked on the wooden chair which was an organic- although not living- material so... halfway there?' He briefly pondered.

Suddenly, his alert system began to blare. He shoved the gadget in his pocket as he hurried back inside, stashed the blueprints in his desk drawer of strange items, and hurried over to his computer display.

The readings were going absolutely crazy, detecting the power source of a ship that didn't match any others he had pulled from past UNIT records and set for reference. They certainly didn't belong to the Doctor's Tardis either, for he had already taken precautions to filter it out. This was something completely new and- judging from his readings- _very_ big.

He quickly opened a live channel to MI6 and broadcasted them his reading in real time.

That same moment, he heard something outside. At first it sounded like a low-flying plane, but he quickly realized that the sound was only growing more intense. Within minutes, it was blocking out the sun.

He stepped outside once more and watched as a large shuttle landed on the barren land, not far from where the Tardis usually landed. He should really tell the Doctor about this, but these creatures were already here. He had to know more.

O took a deep breath to quiet the slowly rising fear in his mind.

If he was going to smooth this over, he needed a plan.

'No,' his instincts took over, "not a plan. You didn't have a singular end goal to reach. You just needed to play the game. Keep yourself alive. Make yourself valuable.'

"Hello!" O greeted the creatures exiting the ship. He gave them a friendly wave with both hands, a gesture to show that he welcomed them unarmed.

The newcomers stepped out of their small pod with an awkwardly low ceiling. Once they stood up high on their back legs, they towered over O's figure. They had intimidatingly enormous scaled-covered wings, long feathered tails, and bat-like faces with deep blank eyes.

O rolled his shoulders to stop himself from rushing over to examine the creatures. They looked like a hodge-podge of different attributes. He was immediately infatuated by their novelty. But now wasn't the time for his curiosity.

"My name is Oh and might I be the first to say it is an absolute PLEASURE to meet you," he attempted to charm them. His eyes scanned over them excitedly before he dipped his head with a smile.

"Out of our way, human," the first and tallest creature dismissed him in a raspy voice,

"We are a faction of the great Krillitain! You're lucky you humans contain no desirable traits, or else I'd kill you where you stand."

The second creature- and O assumed the second in command- unhinged its jaw and curled back its lips in an attempt to scare him.

O did his absolute best not to show a moment of weakness.

'You're not dead in the water yet. You can work with this,' O found himself thinking.

"Really? Is that anyway to greet your host?" O questioned with misleadingly-apathetic disappointment, "I'm far more than your standard human. For one, I know all about the Krillitane. Creatures who assume the attributes of the races they conquer?" He teased with unwavering confidence, "Yes, I know all about you. Truthfully, I admire your work," he teased. "I'm sure I can be of service to you- as an ally, of course."

O had once read a couple files from the Unit archive about the Krillitane, and it was just enough to back the lies from his silver tongue.

It was even enough to make the leader stop in its tracks.

"Just do the math," O sang with the ability of a skilled siren.

"Another living soul, well versed in both Krillitane knowledge as well as the life on this planet? I could be _very_ useful. Especially because, seeing as you're not after humans themselves, I can only conclude that you're searching for something. And that-" he pointed over to his own home, "is my base of operations."

The creature considered this for a long moment.

"Not much to look at, I know- but I assure you, worth the full tour."

O only raised his eyebrows slightly and politely extended a hand, "Do we have an accord?"

The creature paused to look him over, clearly contemplating the worth of O's small figure. O did his best to remain as confident as possible and keep his outstretched hand from shaking. After what felt like an incredibly long moment, the creature retracted the blades on one of its slender, razer-clawed hands and took hold of O's extended hand.

"You talk too much," it told him.

"I thought I was rather concise," O noted before leading the way to his home.

"Do come inside," he added willingly.

He knew full well that if he didn't invite them in, they would have intruded anyways. However- now- they were entering on his terms. He felt the inexplicable need to maintain that power.

"Would you care for tea?"

-

There were four creatures in the party, but O wondered how many remained on the ship above.

More importantly, the fact that they had chosen to land just outside his home had to mean something. That, or they had detected his early warning system. Either way, it could be the most important question he needed answered at the moment.

"So, what brings you to Earth?" He asked politely, heating up the kettle.

The creatures seemed almost baffled by his hospitality.

The two leaders stood at his small, square, dining table, presumably because they had realized they couldn't fit in the chairs surrounding it. The two other creatures began to search through his living room. They were making quite a mess, but no real harm was being done so O ignored it.

"How do you know about us?" The leader asked skeptically.

"I did ask you first," O replied, unwavering and unconcerned, "but in short, you're hardly the first of your kind to visit this planet."

He continued with his tea.

"Will your friends be wanting some?" He inadvertently patronized them. The lead creature looked at him strangely, the solid black eyes and sharp features seemingly knowing only two expressions: disgruntled and aggravated.

O settled on three cups of tea, one for himself, one for grumpy, and one for the second with the strangely red eyes. He stepped around the table to place a mug before each of the two creatures. He managed to snag a loose feather from the leader's massive tail as he passed and surreptitiously slid it into one of the pockets on his vest.

'Perhaps it can be of use to the Doctor,' he decided, 'when I eventually get the chance to contact her.'

"We're looking for something. A craft of legend."

The leader admitted, ignoring the tea.

O sipped from his own mug and listened intently.

The second in command, the shorter creature, elaborated, "It would grant us the ability to travel through space _and_ time. Such a feat uses an incredible amount of power, and we've found a way to track such a machine to this level 5 planet."

O nodded and did his best to keep his eyes from widening.

'They must be after the Doctor's Tardis,' O deduced.

It fit perfectly.

"Travel in time and relative dimensions in space, I presume," he took an extra long sip just to mess with them, "You're after a Gallfreyan Tardis?"

"You've heard of it?" The leader questioned in what O interpreted as surprise. It was difficult to tell with their facial expressions, but it was close enough to connect the two. Three expressions then.

"Not just heard of it. However, you're a little late I'm afraid. You missed it by about-" he hummed in thought, "five earth days?"

"No, it led us here, within the last Earth rotation!" The second in command hissed at him, as if to insinuate that he was lying.

O took another breath. He had to keep up this performance without caving, without showing weakness.

He shrugged vaguely,

"Could be residual energy, or it could be my equipment messing with your systems- in which case I apologize."

Another lie, but it was important to keep the peace without betraying the honesty of either side.

They seemed to buy it, however hotheaded the creatures seemed.

"If you monitor the planet a few more days, I'm sure you'll be able to snag what you're after," O assured them.

Once they left, O could inform the Doctor of his discovery and she could act accordingly and do what she always did: save the world. It was a perfect match.

"What makes you say that?" The leader asked.

"Well the Tardis's PILOT enjoys the occasional vacation on Earth-" he tried not to say too much, but he had to keep it going, "so I'm sure she'll be back at some point. What do you lot want with a Tardis anyways? You all seem fairly... well-adjusted?" He settled on, gesturing to their general visage and then over the rest of them. They were strange, all covered in torn up robes over fur or tiny feathers, he couldn't really see.

"A Tardis would allow us to conquer the civilizations of old as well as those not yet to be. With such an item, we would be limitless," the second in command explained overzealously.

O nodded calmly, "Not a terrible plan. Although I must tell you- as a friend-" he promised with deep innocent-looking eyes, "that its owner is quite attached and I really can not recommend you take it from her. Like many others, it would be the last thing you ever did."

The lead krillitane pinned O to the fridge, nearly knocking over his cup of tea in the process.

"Is that a threat?!"

"That's an empirically proven fact," O wheezed, the claws uncomfortably close to his neck.

One of the creatures who had been looking through his home said something in a language O didn't understand.

Whatever was said immediately caught the leader's attention, judging from the sharp turn of its short neck, and clearly upset it. In some sort of retaliation, it abruptly tossed O across the room as if he weighed nothing at all.

O fell to the floor, sputtering in pain.

"Our equipment says the craft is still here! Are you hiding it from us?!" The intimidating creature accused.

"What? No! Of course not! We have an agreement!" O promised fearfully.

"Then where is the ship?!" The second in command demanded in a thick, raspy tone.

"There isn't one!" O shouted.

Now he was pissed. He wondered what would happen if he let his anger out. He entertained the possibility as he dragged himself up from the floor and onto his feet.

The lead two were moving closer now, completely cornering him. His mind raced to calculate what next move would keep him alive, but he didn't have enough information. This didn't make sense. He wasn't lying!

All at once, a cold realization washed over him. He had a way out, the way out was through. He had a half-functional shrinking device within reach and if he acted quickly enough, he could easily take all four of them on.

He was scared, but was he scared enough to press the button? Knowing that he probably couldn't restore them once it was done?

He wasn't sure. He couldn't remember ever being this angry nor scared before.

His hand slowly reached for his pocket- but he stopped.

On his arm still rested the bracelet the Doctor had left for him. She wouldn't want this for him, he knew deep in his heart. She might never look at him the same way if he killed these creatures, even if they were a threat.

Even with that said, she also wanted him alive- and he didn't understand his situation well enough to talk his way out of this one.

'Why do they think I'm lying?!' O's mind screamed in silence.

"Sir! There's another one!" The second in command suddenly relayed from a communications device on its robe.

All four of the creatures raced outside to search for it.

O was left standing there, shaking.

His hand slowly let go of the device in his pocket.

He didn't think he could use it, but a minute more and it was anyone's guess. His mind was in a whirlwind. He wasn't lying. He had nearly convinced them to leave. What had gone wrong?

-

All at once, a familiar blue box began to materialize before him.

The Doctor swung the door inwards and looked around before her eyes settled on O. She rewarded the sight of him with a bright smile.

With the creatures out of his home and apparently not about to kill him- O's mind had only then begun to process it all. The Doctor's cheerful expression caught him off guard, and for a moment, he could do nothing more than stare at her.

Somehow, she seemed to understand his blank disbelief. The Doctor stepped down from her ship and pulled O to her.

Her tight arms fell around his waist and her chin on his shoulder as she pulled him close. It sparked a great relief within him, but for several seconds, O found himself unable to return the gesture.

A minute more... what WOULD he have done?

"Are you okay?" The Doctor pulled away to look him over. O's hands grabbed for her arms, a deep need to steady himself took over, and finally he found himself back in reality.

"Yeah. Of course," he said, his mouth dry.

"Can I tell you about it somewhere that's not here?" he pleaded, sparing a glance out his window. The krillitane would be back for a second round any minute and he didn't want to be there when they did.

She took his hand and pulled him into the Tardis.

"Of course," the Doctor agreed, "We should get out of here."

-

"That was quick!" O heard one of the Doctor's companions say. The voice sounded distant and O scolded himself for his inability to process it.

He glanced out the Tardis door as the Doctor closed it.

It was only when she walked past him that O's mind finally caught up with reality.

He was fine. He was safe. He had to switch gears.

His hand snatched out to grab the Doctor's sleeve before she could pass him by.

"We have to get off Earth," he implored her.

"You have to get your Tardis off Earth and you have to do it NOW."

His words clearly caught her by surprise, but her expression shifted to something very serious. She pulled away and hurried to the Tardis console. O chased after her.

"Not just space either! You have to get the Tardis somewhere far in the past, somewhere they can't find you."

"I should drop off the others first-" the Doctor began.

"There's. Not. Time." O promised her, his voice dropping into something focused and cold, "believe me. I'll tell you everything- but you have to get us out of here first."

His eyes met hers like they were in a staring match.

The Doctor's hands froze on the dials and, a moment later, she was undoing the action and setting different coordinates. She set the date she thought was best and aimed for it as well as she could with the breakneck speed she was currently piloting the Tardis at. The ship began to shake and rock at least twice as bad as usual.

The Doctor nearly stumbled over her own feet as she hurried around the Tardis, trying to keep it stable.

"What are you doing?" The Doctor asked as O beat her to a switch.

"You taught me how to fly her, remember?"

He hit the next switch needed. His dark eyes spared her a glance of dismay before they flickered back to the task at hand. He spun a dial and then pulled the main lever to land.

The Doctor could feel herself being shaken by the Tardis, but she was lost in the sight of O piloting her ship. For a long moment, she could have sworn he was referring to their childhood adventures.

It finally hit her that she HAD actually told O about flying the Tardis. When she had been getting used to the new controls, she told O about all the new buttons that ultimately performed the same actions as her old controls, and the controls before that and so on. Some things were for show, but the basics were always ultimately the same. She just hadn't realized he had been paying close enough attention to remember them.

The distraction nearly caused her to fall, but O reached out an arm to her to catch before she hit the floor. The Doctor regained her footing as O spun around one of the monitors.

O's eyes flickered to the string of numbers and letters he assumed represented their exact location in time and space. He briefly wondered what would happen if he were to enter the coordinates he found back home. He pushed away the idea without knowing why.

The Doctor quickly stepped up to the metaphorical plate and translated the circular writing displayed by the monitor.

"Alita, a moon of a far away galaxy, owned by what is later known as the Shadow Proclamation, adjacent to Earth's 5000 BC. Far enough?" She asked O.

"If not we're in a lot of trouble," he replied flatly, stepping back from the controls.

He wasn't liking the feeling fear gave him. It was a rush, but one he didn't understand how to control. Fear made him feel powerless and when he was scared, something told him that control was the solution.

Now that he was safe, he needed it to be quiet.

"So what are you running from?" Yaz asked him.

Maybe safe was the wrong word, but he needed to get his head in order.

"And how did the Doctor know you were in danger?" Yaz continued.

That one stopped O dead in his tracks. He looked up to Yaz and then over to the Doctor. His fear melted into infatuated curiosity.

"How DID you know?" He asked smoothly.

The Doctor almost looked downright annoyed that it had been brought up.

O's lips curled into an amused smile to see that look on the Doctor's face. Whoever was on the receiving end was usually in huge trouble.

Ryan didn't catch the exchange and spoke up helpfully,

"We were just on this trip and then she said something was wrong and raced right to you- ow!" He said as Yaz elbowed him.

O nearly blushed, but did his best to deflect it with humor.

"Why Doctor-"

"Don't you start!" The Doctor immediately shut it down,

"I just- You're welcome!" She exclaimed mercilessly.

"Much obliged. But really-" O began.

The Doctor cut him off impatiently,

"I thought you had more important things to say? Like why we're all the way out here?"

They glared at each other for several long seconds at a stalemate, but O blinked first, so he began.

"There's a large ship belonging to a faction of Krillitain," O explained to the Doctor. He spared the occasional glance to the others.

"I say faction _specifically_ because that's how they introduced themselves. Which checks out because they don't look anything like the files on the Krillitane that I've read about in Unit's archives. They have bigger wings, feathered tails, and claws like knives. They also have a set hierarchy instead of referring to each other as 'brother' or 'sister'. They must have developed quite a bit since the last time they were here; or maybe this is an independent group that conquered different worlds."

"What do you mean?" Graham asked.

O meandered up a batch of hexagonal steps, unable to stay still while the Doctor spoke.

The Doctor leaned back against the console and explained energetically,

"The krillitane are a species that absorb the attributes of the worlds they conquer. They find a nice planet of beings with wings, and they can take those wings and any other physical attributes at their own discretion. Once they take that trait, it becomes a part of themselves forever- or until they see something they like better."

O nodded and stepped down to stand across from the Doctor. His hands rested in his pockets to stop him from waving them about while he spoke. Still, one broke free while his mind was too busy compiling his own words to notice.

"Somehow, they've found a way to track your Tardis. They heard of Tardises through some legend and now they're determined to steal one for themselves. They said they could use it to conquer advanced species from the past and future so they could become unstoppable."

"And they just told you all this?" Yaz asked skeptically, closing the group into a circle. Her crossed arms and harsh gaze told him all he needed to know.

O impulsively stifled a defensive snicker.

"You don't become a spy with luck," he sang with false-bravado, "I had to play the game and keep myself alive. So yeah, they did just tell me. I'm that good."

O crossed the distance once more to stand next to the Doctor, "What I don't understand is, why were their readings off? They said they had tracked 'such a craft'- presumably a Tardis- to 'this level 5 planet' which I have to assume is Earth. So why land near my home? They were _very_ confident their readings showed a Tardis there, but you said you have the only one," he explained to the Doctor. "If their readings hadn't been wrong I probably could have convinced them to leave without a problem."

O was too lost in thought to see the speed at which the Doctor turned away, but Yaz noticed and her eyes narrowed at the sight. She chose not to mention it out loud.

"Two of a kind you are," Graham chuckled.

"What?!" The Doctor and O replied in unison.

"You sound alike is all," Graham elaborated innocently, "examining the situation from all angles, working out a solution. Right pair you are," he chuckled.

The Doctor glanced back at O who's toothfulled grin was getting the better of him.

"I simply found out what I could. And-!" O exclaimed. He suddenly remembered the item and he pulled the feather he had surreptitiously swiped from his pocket. He looked it over for a moment as he spoke.

"I took this from one of them. I'm not sure if it'll be of any use, but they are the sum of their parts," he offered it to the Doctor. "Finding out what worlds they conquered might shed some light on the subject."

The Doctor gasped at the sight and carefully took the feather in her own hands.

"O! This is wonderful! Get us a real picture of what we're up against!"

She ran to a different part of the console and put the feather on a little plate for analysis.

"I could kiss you!" She cheered absentmindedly.

"I wouldn't be opposed," O replied, unabashed.

The Doctor wasn't paying attention to his reply as she set up the system to read the DNA from the feather.

"Once the Tardis sequences the genetic code, we'll be able to get a real picture of these creatures and what they've been up to!" She beamed cheerfully.

She did a lap around the center and O quickly stepped out of her way as the Doctor made a beeline for the screen once more. She patted the side of it and hummed curiously.

"What does it say, Doc?" Graham asked excitedly.

The Doctor scrunched her face together, "It says it might take a few minutes."

Yaz quickly cut in at the first opportunity, "Doctor, can I talk to you for a minute?"

"Of course," the Doctor smiled, sparing her a glance over her shoulder.

"Down the hall," Yaz added more seriously with a nod of her head in that direction.

"Ah. Okay." The Doctor pressed her lips together.

Yaz led the way down the hall and the Doctor spared Graham and Ryan an apologetic look.

She carefully caught the side of O's face as she passed and brought his cheek to her lips. O's mind barely had time to register the gesture before it was over.

"Good work, that," the Doctor gestured as she left the room.

O choked down the pleasant feeling her praise brought him and silently begged his heart to settle down. They had work to do.

-

"Doctor, you can't just trust him!" Yaz finally burst once she and the Doctor were in an adequately distant room.

The room was part of the lower wardrobe and Yaz hoped it would muffle things enough to give them some privacy.

"Yaz, you don't understand-" the Doctor began, her hands out before her like she was grasping for the right thing to say.

Yaz shook her head. She could already see where this was going and she had to explain herself before the Doctor got carried away,

"Yeah, that's just it! I don't understand! Because you never tell us anything!" Yaz began, her expression clearly showing just how hurt she felt by all of this.

"One day Oh's this nice guy you've been talking to for- I don't know how long- before you met the three of us. And the next second he tries to kill us in a plane crash!

I was there, Doctor. I saw how scared you were when you realized who he was."

The Doctor ran her tongue over her lips and let her gaze fall to the floor as Yaz continued,

"And then all that business on your home planet? Doctor, you were willing to KILL HIM AND YOURSELF! And all those Cybermen, and everything else! Doesn't that _mean_ anything?!"

The Doctor's eyes stayed locked onto the floor for a long moment before she finally felt the strength to look up again,

"Yaz, that's not who he is anymore," she promised wholeheartedly.

"Really?" Yaz exclaimed with disbelief, "Why? Because he looks and acts like your friend O before he betrayed you?"

The Doctor suddenly snapped at her accusation,

"Because he looks and acts like my friend before I abandoned him!"

Yaz flinched back at the Doctor's dark expression.

The Doctor raised a hand to her mouth, immediately regretting her outburst.

Tears quickly flooded the Doctor's eyes. She continued, painfully honest. It was only a matter of time before the weight of it all broke through anyways.

"I left him, and while I was gone: the world broke him! He wasn't... as strong as me. I just didn't realize it before it was too late."

"Doctor..." Yaz began to say. The Doctor didn't let her finish, her kind expression shifting into something broken.

"I've wanted nothing more than to have him back for lifetimes and now- I won't give him up. I'm alone, Yaz."

The words sprung tears to Yaz's own eyes as she looked over the Doctor's weakened state.

The Doctor continued,

"The Master wanted me to kill him because he was dying and he didn't want us to be apart. He wanted me to kill us both and prove that we were worth the same. One of the last things he did was give me information about _my life_ that my own people had kept hidden from me. I think... I think he killed them all because of what he discovered. He did that, Yaz. He did that for me. It's wrong but... he did that for me."

Yaz coaxed the Doctor closer and pulled her into a tight hug to steady her. The Doctor allowed it, and continued even more quietly,

"He found a way to cheat death. He doesn't remember those things and it's selfish, but we're both happy. I just want to keep it that way."

"Doctor, I had no idea-"

"I know," the Doctor clutched her fingers tightly into Yaz's faux-leather jacket.

"More than anything, I don't want him to hurt you like that again," Yaz admitted, "I can't sit by and watch him hurt you over and over again."

"I appreciate that, Yaz," The Doctor sighed.

Finally, the Doctor backed away. She took a deep breath and composed herself once more.

For a long moment, Yaz simply looked over her with an aching heart. It hurt Yaz to see the pain all this caused such an incredible woman. She had seen the Doctor in countless impossible situations, always racing about with one brilliant plan after the next.

But this? There was no plan, no logic. Just... hope that against all odds, they could be happy.

Yaz smiled softly. The Doctor always was such a huge fan of hope.

Finally the Doctor began to lead the way back. She had only opened the door when she paused to turn back to Yaz. The Tardis's hallway lights illuminated her gorgeously.

"It hurts, knowing you only have so much time with someone," the Doctor told Yaz, a bittersweet smile spreading across her lips, "but some people are worth the pain you'll feel when they're gone."

Yaz nodded, letting go of her fear that O would hurt the Doctor all over again. That... that was something she could understand. It was how she felt about the Doctor after all.

"I know what you mean," Yaz nodded.

They headed back to the main room.

-

O turned his attention to the Tardis's monitor the moment Yaz and the Doctor stepped away. He watched as the indecipherable circles spun before locking in place, as if they somehow showed the progress of the DNA sequencing.

He stood with a shoulder to the nearest glowing amber pillar. The room really was ever so dramatic, but there was something comforting about its mix of yellow and blue. In a way, it very much reflected the Doctor's current incarnation.

He tossed one ankle over the other and crossed his arms. After a moment to get his thoughts in order, he decided it best to address the two remaining companions. He instinctively lifted his chin, refusing to show how nervous he was to bring up the sore topic.

The obvious disconnect between how the Doctor's friends saw him versus the person he believed himself to be made him uneasy, to say the least. Especially because- from the gaps in O's memory and the evidence he found around his home- even he was beginning to question his identity.

He had to explain who he was. Confirm it to both those around him as much as to himself.

"I know none of you trust me," O brought the issue to light in a factual, resolute voice.

"No, it's just-" Graham began politely.

O raised a hand to him to save it.

"It's alright," O assured them.

O knew he had to address the issue, however much he didn't want to.

"I know I can come on a little strong. And..." he turned his head away from them, almost embarrassed by what he had to say.

"I have time missing from my life. I don't know how much, but I know I've been involved in at least one of the Doctor's adventures when facing some alien race called the Kus-uh-vin-"

"Kasaavin," Graham corrected him.

"Gesundheit," O joked flatly, "I don't know what happened during that time, nor what else was erased. I know it must've somehow involved the three of you and the Doctor, but I don't even know who any of you are. I know I must've done something to warrant your distrust, but I don't remember any of it."

O looked back to them, his eyes glassy and drained from the mental toll it cost him to be honest about this.

"I just want you to know that I'd never do anything to hurt the Doctor, or any of you. I... care about the Doctor."

He took a deep breath and pulled himself together. He stepped away from the pillar and meandered slowly across the room.

"I haven't told her about any of this. I know if she's hiding something from me there's always a good reason. I'm only telling you because- whatever I did- I hope I can earn back your trust. The Doctor would want us to get along."

Ryan and Graham looked at each other for a long moment, contemplating this.

O could see from their hesitation that whatever he'd done would take much longer to fix. To make matters worse, it suddenly struck O that he must've done something far worse than he'd previously theorized.

He turned away from them and headed back for the console screen. Perhaps the sequencing was finished- not that he could read the results if it was. Anything to distract him from wondering what terrible act had been purged from his memory.

However, the elder of the two approached him and held out a hand before he could spiral very far. O's paused in surprise and dragged himself back out of his own mind to evaluate the situation. The man only had a kind smile on his face, so O took his outstretched hand.

"My name's Graham O'Brian. It's nice to meet you, Oh."

O's expression immediately brightened with a goofy uneven smile. He soon saw it reflected by the others equally cheerful grins.

Ryan closed the space next and held out his hand, "Yeah O, nice t' meet ya! An' just so you know, you saved the Doctor's life last time we saw ya, so you're a'ight in my book."

O shook it enthusiastically and a small chuckle escaped his lips. It was a great weight off his shoulders, to be welcomed as who he was. The others smiled at him brighter than they ever had before and the tense feeling between them quickly disappeared.

"Thank you," O beamed, "I really appreciate it."

-

The Doctor and Yaz returned very soon thereafter and everyone sprung to life.

"Excellent!" The Doctor announced, quickly taking the small Tardis screen between her hands, "Let's find out what we're up against."

She scanned it over with her sonic and a moment later, a projection of the large creature appeared. O took a deep breath at the sight of the lead krillitain's massive form, towering over them all. Seeing the same face he had thought might kill him just minutes ago was still a little too fresh in his mind for comfort.

The companions let out small remarks of amazement as they looked it over.

Meanwhile, the Doctor's bright eyes narrowed at the readings for a long moment, keeping the others in suspense as she read the unique gallifreyan on the display.

"Alright, bipedal then. Still resemble bats so not much of a difference there. Wings from.... blimey....."

The Doctor's enthusiasm seemed to drain away with each passing word.

"So what's it mean, Doctor?" Ryan asked.

The Doctor didn't reply for what felt like a very long minute. None of the others had any idea how to interpret her silence and not even O had a guess as to what the Doctor had found. He looked over the screen, but it was all gibberish to him.

"We don't know how the krillitane are able to track the Tardis," the Doctor finally stated.

"I need to find out how. In the meantime, I'm dropping you all back on Earth."

"Doctor, you can't do that!" Ryan protested.

"Yeah, we told you we're with you! If these things are that dangerous, we can't let you go there alone," Yaz added.

"Yeah Doc, we've got your back!"

The Doctor looked over them indecisively before her gaze landed on O. He had been thoughtfully pacing about the room but glanced up to meet her eyes with a gentle smirk.

"You heard them," he noted warmly, "We're all with you."

The Doctor's eyes sharply snapped back to the screen.

"Alright. Fine," she agreed somewhat coldly.

She turned back to the console and looked over all its buttons and switches and wheels and levers.

'Why won't you take me with you?' O's words came back to haunt her. She remembered her answer,

'What I do is dangerous. I can't put you through that.'

'You bring other people with you all the time.'

'I probably shouldn't.'

If those creatures got ahold of her Tardis, they would use her friends against her without a second thought. She wasn't about to choose between the safety of countless worlds throughout time and space, and her chosen family.

All that talk... all of her fam's promises, and all O's unconditional support... and she was about to betray it all to keep them safe.

It helped that O's home was already a pre-set.

She turned a few knobs and in an instant, her Tardis was rematerializing a short distance from O's hut. If she was fast, she would have just enough time. It put a strain on her Tardis, but she had to do it.

"Doctor, _what are you doing_?!" O's voice demanded. He had picked up on her plan the instant it had begun.

Just as fast as they had landed, the Tardis began to dematerialize again. The ship's interior flashed varying levels of transparency around them, its blue lights deepening and mixing with the real world outside.

"Doctor?" The others echoed each other with increasing levels of worry.

The Doctor didn't look at them.

A breeze blew past them but it didn't affect the Doctor. She began to disappear along with the interior. O rushed to her, but his hand passed through her shoulder and a faint tingling warned him not to try it again.

Quickly, the view of empty land became their new surroundings and the ship's interior completely faded away.

All at once, the four humans were standing alone on the dry grass.

"No! No! NO!" O shouted furiously. He paced in energetic circles of frustration, fuming at the fact that he hadn't been fast enough to catch Doctor's deception. He moved as if he was as light as air, as if his anger made his strength boundless. He ran his hands through his hair and stared up at the sky as his mind raced for a solution while the others caught themselves up.

"She just dropped us here? After all that?" Yaz huffed.

"Maybe she'll come back," Ryan replied with an optimistic shrug, "It could be part of the plan."

"I don't know about that," Graham suggested, "I think she was worried about putting us in danger. The whole lot of us against some hodge-podge creatures? Maybe she thought it best to handle this one on 'erown."

"Yeah, but she doesn't have to!" Yaz reiterated before adding irritably, "She can't do this to us all over again! With her running off and us not knowing if she's dead or not-"

Suddenly, they realized that O was easily within earshot. They didn't dare say too much in case he was listening; but O wasn't paying them any mind.

He had already burnt himself out trying to think of what he should do and what he COULD do.

So instead of debating the topic, he just sat there with his back to the Doctor's friends, staring at the gift carefully tied around his wrist.

There was nothing they could do. He would just have to wait and hope the Doctor returned.

'Something could happen to me. I could leave and never be able to come back,' she had told him once.

'You're worth the pain,' he had replied, 'No matter what, you're always hopeful. I think I could manage it myself for a little while. Ever the optimist, me.'

He had meant every word, but he could have never imagined he would have to act on them so soon.

For a long moment he simply sat there, staring into the distance and listening for the Tardis's distinctive noise. There was a slim-to-none chance, but a chance all the same, that she would return, like she always did.

When that long minute was over: O stood himself up, and invited the others in for tea.


	2. All In

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While the Doctor discovers how the Krillitane are able to track Tardises, O and the fam reconcile with being left on Earth. Everything goes smoothly... until it doesn't.

The Doctor hadn't wanted to trick her fam like that, but she knew they would have never left of their own volition. Returning them to Earth was the best way to keep them safe.

The DNA sequence had revealed that the creatures O faced were indeed a different group of krillitane. A different family than the ones she had met on Earth before. Only their basic genetic structure identified them as krillitane while every other trait had been shoehorned into place, even ones that had no sense being part of these creatures.

Stolen wings, stolen tails, stolen skin, unhingable jaws, and claws that could extend like katanas. That was only the tip of the iceberg.

What caught her attention was a seemingly frivolous trait: fire resilient skin. At first glance it seemed trivial, but the Doctor knew a much darker meaning behind it. The only creatures who had naturally developed that ability lived beyond Earth's current observable universe. Over a million lightyears away.

This meant that this faction of krillitane must possess some VERY impressive technology to have made the trip from there to Earth in such a short amount of time- technology they had probably stolen it and shaped to fit their own selfish desires. There was no telling what other tricks they had stolen on their conquests.

It was better her friends weren't there. However, the Doctor was quickly realizing that going it alone was never nearly as easy. She was now down several helping hands, brilliant minds, and moral compasses.

"Think Doctor!" She told herself as she scrambled around the Tardis.

"Alright," she replied to herself.

"The krillitane have acquired some way of tracking Tardises," she carefully articulated each word.

"I need to find out how. Presumably, they must be using stolen technology from one of the worlds they conquered- but how EXACTLY? Are they tracking the Tardis's background radiation?" The Doctor tilted her head as she pondered her own question, "Or perhaps something in the engine signature? Think!"

She set the Tardis systems to scan for any creatures matching the sequenced DNA. Advanced cloaking technology could hide their ship, but it couldn't completely hide its passengers. In seconds, the screen flickered and the Tardis began to move all on its own.

"Whoah there, m'lady! What is it?" The Doctor reached a hand for the center pillar, the bright amber light it produced illuminating her concerned expression.

A full scan couldn't have possibly been completed so quickly, even by a Tardis as powerful as the Doctor's. No, instead, her ship seemed to have detected something personally upsetting and _chose_ to act all on its own.

The screen flickered again to reveal the schematics of a huge, combat-ready craft in orbit.

The Doctor let out a sharp breath, perturbed to find relatively new wounds reopening. She was never a fan of military ships. They always had a certain cold air of death to them. They were so cold and barren that nothing could survive there for long.

On top of that, this was an insult to injury. She had scared her fam as well as O nearly half to death after an unfortunate accident aboard one of these things. O was always telling her she needed someone to watch her back and now she was about to board the ship alone.

Still, there had to be more to it than that from the way her Tardis reacted. By the stars, how could anything be worse?

Of course this would be just her luck.

"Krillitane. Professional raiders is what you are. Stole this dreadful ship too, no doubt," the Doctor chided under her breath as she contemplated the topic.

"Of course I have a plan," she answered to no one.

"I need to find out how they're tracking Tardises, stop them, and apologize to my fam. Then it's custard creams for all! I'll pick some up on my way back in fact," she promised aloud with false cheerfulness.

The Doctor took a deep breath. She didn't need to put on a show. She wasn't sure why she kept doing it.

The Doctor patted her console for luck- an inexplicable but apparently enduring new tradition- and headed for the front doors.

She pulled open her Tardis door to find herself parked in an empty hall. She turned up her nose as the cold metallic scent washed over her. After a quick glance around, she scanned her own Tardis and adjusted her sonic. If something aboard this giant ship could lock onto her Tardis, then she should be able to follow the signal back to its source just as easily.

The device picked up on a match immediately and she spun around to find which direction to travel. The readings lead her down a long empty hall. With a ship this massive, she wasn't surprised if it would take a minute or so.

"So far so good," she noted. "Now where could you be hiding? _What_ could you be hiding?"

Her sonic began to flash and she sped up. She raced up the hall with building anticipation.

"Behind this door! Excellent!" she cheered as the light lit up completely.

She pressed a button on a small panel next to the door, beaming away happily and rocking on her feet with anticipation.

"We'll be back before-"

The metal door quickly slid open, revealing the ship's main desk filled with at least 6 different krillitane creatures- all of which spun around at her intrusion.

The Doctor ducked her head inside and spared them a wide smile as she examined the room.

The large creatures stared at her blankly for several moments. Their furless, bat-like faces appeared to be locked in a permanent expression of annoyance and their blank, black eyes looked over her like she was both a ghost and a target. She admired their combination of large, tight-skinned wings and long feathered tails. She may have even been intrigued if not for the high risk of being murdered.

The Doctor quickly disregarded all of that as her eyes fell to the very front of the ship where a large, three-paneled window displayed a gorgeous view of the Earth. On the floor just before it sat a mess of wires and crudely cut metal scraps holding what looked like a large, faintly-glowing gemstone in place. It looked as if the flight system that had once been there had been torn out by the studs and replaced with something haphazard that couldn't be more out of place.

The second the Doctor's eyes landed on it, she knew it was the item of her search.

Suddenly, it all made sense. These creatures were messing with things beyond their understanding.

The item sitting there looked like little more than a glorified chunk of slag. A thick layer of grime coating the beautiful item. A faint glow pulsed through the cracks in its rough outer layer, like there was something much more within it desperately trying to survive to its next breath.

The Doctor's entire mindset shifted to something cold and furious.

There was no Tardis locator. All along it was this still-living, once beautiful soul, broken open from the safety of its shell. A Tardis core, an exposed heart, tormented but surviving. And now its cries for help were being used to hunt down others like it. The second the Doctor had stepped into the room she had been slammed by the tardis heart's psychic connection lashing out for her, clinging to her- the only person who could hear its suffering. The only person who might be able to do something about it.

"Where did you get that?" She asked as every merciful instinct she was capable of began to shut themselves off, one-by-one.

"Who are you-" one of the creatures began.

"Where?!" She snapped sharply.

Maybe her people hadn't always respected Tardises the way they should, but they were living as well as machine. They _certainly_ didn't deserve to be tortured in this way.

"We raid a lot of worlds, some of them were working on some interesting technology before we arrived," the tallest said coldly. She recognized the figure as the original owner of the feather in her Tardis.

The Doctor briefly wondered if these creatures had any idea what they were doing. Probably not, but if they did- would they even care?

She needed to put an end to this as soon as possible.

"Give it to me, and I'll spare all of you and your ship," the Doctor promised.

She hadn't yet decided on an alternative if they refused to comply, but- against all odds- she really hoped they would take the deal.

Being in the same room with a broken Tardis heart was like hearing a loved one weep while being forced to sit in the next room, powerless to change anything. She choked down the feeling. She didn't have time for its mournful song. Not to mention, she was clearly the only one who could hear it.

The Doctor raised her sonic to drive home her point. It wasn't much of a threat, but maybe they didn't know that.

The creatures only laughed- or at least she assumed so judging from their raspy clicking noises they made from their unhinged jaws.

"Get the invader! Lock them up!" The leader ordered.

"For an invasive species that's quite hypocritical of you-!" The Doctor began. She didn't have time to further lecture them as several of the large creatures bolted towards her.

She stepped back to the hall and shut the door before jamming the lock with her sonic.

She sprinted through the hall as fast as possible, but the krillitanes’ long legs would certainly give them the upper hand. She needed to get back to her own Tardis as soon as possible.

She was nearly there when one of the creatures suddenly leapt from seemingly nowhere and rammed her into the nearest wall. The Doctor instantly saw black.

-

"How can you just stand there and drink tea!" Yaz scolded O.

Not that he cared. In all honesty, displaying her anger was probably the far healthier option compared to what O was currently doing with his own.

He'd like to express more than a little rage himself- he had felt it building deep in his gut ever since this whole thing started- but he, instead, chose to shove it down as far as possible.

At this point, it felt like his only option was to shut down to keep his fury from boiling over. He had never considered himself a hot head, but he feared that if he stopped fighting his anger, for even a moment, he might lose control of it completely. He held grudges, sure, but this was very different. 

It was too much. The krillitane nearly killing him for reasons he still couldn't fathom, the Doctor putting herself in harm's way while leaving them all on Earth- powerless to help, and the mysterious haze looming over his life was the cherry on top. For the first time, the weight of it all was threatening to tip some sort of scale in his mind.

He felt like he was cornered all over again, but he didn't know what was keeping him there. For the first time, he wondered if his biggest fear might be of himself and what he might do if-

"O!"

O snapped to reality in the blink of an eye. He raised an acknowledging glance to Yaz, who had apparently said more and was now properly exhasperated that he hadn't heard a word of it.

"Did you hear me? We need a plan!"

"That's not how I do things," O found himself saying.

It was said impulsively, and he bit his tongue once the words had escaped. He had to reel all this in.

If he could wait it out like he had promised he could... the Doctor would come back. He had to stay focused on that to keep himself sane.

He took another sip just to hide his poor reaction.

He didn't believe it yet, but he was willing to convince himself it was true until he heard the Doctor's wheezing Tardis rematerialize outside his front door like it had so many times before. He was perfectly willing to stand there until it happened, just drinking his tea. Just pretending everything would be okay.

"Not how you do things?" Yaz retorted.

O felt frozen, leaning back against his sink, one ankle crossed over the other. He was tense, on edge, and yet he breathed self-assurance. He could understand how she could mistake his inaction for apathy.

"I play the game," he explained as calmly as he could, "and I'm usually quite good at it- but I have no moves left to make. I have to trust that the Doctor will return... in time. It's all I can do."

He wished he could initiate a link to the mind sharing ability the Doctor occasionally shared with him. If he could only ask her, perhaps he could put them all at ease.

Almost as an answer to his prayer, he received the exact opposite of what he wanted. For only an instant- he felt the Doctor connecting to his mind. Usually it was something gentle and calming, but this was sharp and terrifying.

A wave of crippling fear washed over him before a physical pain accompanied it.

His mug slipped through his careful hands and crashed loudly at his feet. The fragile container shattered, launching tiny fragments in all directions as it connected with the wood floor.

"You alright?"

"You okay, man?"

"What's wrong?"

"The Doctor... s-she... something's wrong," O stuttered.

His gaze stayed locked onto the broken mug at his feet, eyes wide in shock but obstructed from his present company by a curtain of messy hair.

He couldn't hear anything anyone was saying as his rage overtook him, escaping the parameters he had designed to keep it in check. This was too far. No one got to hurt the Doctor, not if he had anything to say about it. Not if he could _do anything_ about it.

Now he knew that he couldn't wait idly by for her to return. He had to get to the Doctor. He didn't care what it took to ensure her safety, he would see it done.

O stepped across the broken shards as if they weren't there. He didn't have time to waste.

"We have to get to her as soon as possible. If we can- Maybe we can get one of their crafts to return to Earth. W-we can fly it up to their main ship," he considered.

His mind was burning in frustration. He tightened his hands into fists in a failing attempt to stop them from shaking. He paced through his home, looking for any inspiration that could help them. He tapped his hands against either side of his head until an idea struck him,

"Ah! I can send up a false signal! I know the usual Tardis output- I designed dampeners for its signal after all! We would have to take out those creatures, and of course figure out how to pilot the pod to the mothership...."

Outside of his racing mind, his actions increased tenfold in energy. He moved like he was walking on air and his hands flew around with every move. The adrenalin coursing through his system made him strong. Stronger than his fear. Strong enough to do something about what scared him.

"Of course they _could_ have sensors to detect and kill us before we ever break the atmosphere- but I'm willing to give it a shot. Their shuttles didn't look like they were designed for them anyways so I can't imagine they have too many fail-safes in place."

O tossed his up hands in realization, "Too short for those large wings! That's what bothered me. Obviously, the krillitane prefer constant conquest so it makes sense that their equipment is stolen. Not a bad _business model really_ , always progressing- but in this case, we can use it in our favor."

He ruffled his hands through his hair, a swing slipping into his voice,

"I can lure them with a false signal of another Tardis. It's a bit of a gamble, but if they bite: we can take them out when they get here, and take the shuttle up to their main ship. That's sure to be where the Doctor is!"

His eyes jokingly spun back to the other three, awaiting their input or some kind of agreement.

"Unless you have a better plan," he added.

After being met with silence, his eyes better focused in on their expressions.

"O..." Yaz began, her body language shifting inwards.

"I think... you ought to take a minute-"

"You were just telling me we have to act!" He shot back, "That we need a plan!"

O's lips pulled back to reveal a teethfilled grin that didn't quite reach his eyes.

"I- I'm not sure how it will play out, but I'm sure a few of those creatures is nothing we can't handle-"

He reached out a hand for Yaz's forearm. He had been attempting to reassure her- at least he was reasonably certain that was what he was doing- but Yaz sharply pulled away in a panic.

O froze and shifted to his back foot. 

He was only trying to find a way to save the Doctor and now suddenly all three of them were looking at him like he was... someone else.

He straightened himself up and looked between the three humans with uncertainty.

"I-"

He caught hold of his anger, enthusiasm, energy, whatever it was, and did his best to shut it down. The three looked... scared. He didn't want them to be scared... but he didn't want to be scared either. He didn't want to be powerless while he knew the Doctor was in danger.

He... he was doing what they wanted. He was making a plan. That... t-that was what they wanted.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" He asked, terrified to know if they would dare tell him the truth.

He made a u-turn twice as fast.

Now that all this power was out of its container, he had to harness it. It wouldn't fit back into its original packaging anyways.

"No- you know what?" he hissed sharply, "It doesn't matter. We have to get to the Doctor. I'm not going to lose her. _Especially_ not like this!"

He tried to shake away his doubt. He wasn't about to let the Doctor die at the hands of those terrifying things. He wasn't about to let her be tortured for the key to her Tardis. He didn't care what he had to do- he wanted the Doctor _safe_.

He had never felt this way before. His mind turned every hint of fear into anger, and harnessed every spark of that anger into overwhelming power. He needed every iota of it he possessed could get if it meant he could save the Doctor.

One man, impossible odds. Why did it give him such a rush? Dare he say it felt... right.

"None of us want to lose the Doc, O," Graham approached him.

"It's just...."

"What?" O snapped at him, a glare locking onto the older man.

"If you don't trust me that's fine, just stay out of my way."

O turned to his 'Horizon Watcher' and looked it over. If he sent out bursts of energy imitating that of a Tardis, then it might be enough to warrant a search party.

It would take time... and luck. He had no assurance they would bother with it if they already had the Doctor captive. And even if they did, what would he have to do in his pursuit to steal their ship?

He was willing to try, but it might take too much time and too much luck: neither of which he historically had in his favor. He needed to get to the Doctor _NOW_.

His mind was racing, skipping over ideas and information he hadn't been able to connect before.

He knew something in his mind was keeping a wall between parts of his life, but he didn't necessarily need to knock it down. He just needed to reconnect what he had already discovered and with his mind in its current state, he found it easier than ever before.

The book, the coordinates, the reactions, the letter, the parcel. It all added up somehow.

There was something he was missing. Something big and useful, a new puzzle piece nearly within his grasp.

He straightened up and let his attention fall away from what he had been doing to follow this new train of thought.

He turned to the others and pointed his left arm out to Yaz. His head tilted slightly in curiosity. It was all adding up now.

Those creatures had suspected O of lying about there being a Tardis nearby. It was the one miscalculation, the one things that didn't add up. Things wouldn't have gone down this way if the krillitane hadn't suspected he was lying.

He stared Yaz down.

O could feel himself cooling off. He didn't need an elaborate plan, he never did. He didn't need to remember what he was missing. Like always, all he had to do was play the game with what he already had.

"Why are you pointing at me?" Yaz asked.

O lowered his arm and rubbed the back of his neck.

He chuckled briefly, recovering from whatever had overtaken him. He was angry, but there would be time for anger when he found whoever had hurt the Doctor. He had to do this one thing at a time.

"Sorry. Sorry, I got carried away," O returned his hands to his pockets. For the first time in a long time, he felt refreshed.

The Doctor once admitted that he thinks the way she does. He hadn't known what that meant at the time, but if it means something inside him knew how to do this, then he was just going to have to trust it.

"There are a lot of things that don't make sense to me," he explained, "but the things that don't make sense are clues I can use. First, when the krillitane tracked a Tardis to Earth they came here first. I thought they had been tracking the energy from the Doctor's Tardis making jumps- a big output, it would have made sense- but she hadn't been here in a while. So it would only be rational to conclude that it wasn't what they were tracking. Which should be impossible. The Doctor's race is gone, there's no one else left to _fly_ another Tardis. But you, Yaz."

He strolled closer but stayed a good few steps away.

"When I mentioned to the Doctor that she had the only Tardis you looked at her like-" he couldn't quite find the word, "like she had lied. Which means she doesn't have the only Tardis. I know...."

He hesitated. He still found it difficult to say,

"I know there was someone before me. There was another Time Lord who was the Doctor's friend. I don't have any memory of him- but I do know that he trusted me with some very important items. I don't think it would be much of a leap to assume that he had a Tardis as well."

All at once, he found himself out of his depths, like he hadn't realized what he had been leading up to until suddenly he was hearing it said via his own words.

"He left it here, with his other things. Am I right?"

His last words escaped his lips softly.

He wasn't sure what their confirmation would mean. At the very least, it meant they could get to the Doctor. At the very most, it could have more answers than O was ready to find.

The companions looked to each other but didn't answer right away.

"Close enough," O observed.

He slowly paced a circle around his living room.

"Now, if someone was to hide the controls to such a machine in a place like this...."

He was looking for something obvious yet hidden. Something he would never think to check if he didn't already know what he was looking for. He thoughtfully eliminated every space he frequented. All he needed was a large enough entrance to an area that could be bigger on the inside....

O abruptly grinned and hurried to the back of the room where a small closet sat. He swung open the door.

"There's a storage area in the attic. A tiny place. I've never even opened it. Never had any reason to. But if I'm right...."

He stacked several boxes full of paper and climbed up it to remove a ceiling panel. He grinned as he looked up to the area, a red light illuminating his thrilled face.

"Oh, I am _good_ ," he beamed away, his hair messily draping over his face.

He stepped onto the boxes and pulled himself up to the second floor.

A moment later, his head ducked down from the ceiling.

"I'm going to save the Doctor with or without you lot. Are you just going to stand there?"

The three humans deliberated for several agonizing moments. They whispered things and exchanged uneasy looks.

O couldn't hear them and he didn't care. He didn't have time for this. He tried to hold onto his limited patience, but anger was still fighting for control of his mind.

"Now's the time to decide," he rephrased it.

"Either come up here and help me rescue the Doctor, or get out of my house and wait by the nice oak out front! I don't care."

And then he disappeared once more.

Yaz's determined eyes met Ryan's uneasy consideration and a moment later, O was helping the other three up through the gap.

"How does this all fit up here?" Graham said, the last up and shocked to see what was, no doubt, the inside of a Tardis.

"The Doctor is always going on about her timelord engineering. I'm sure the same principles apply," O reasoned, too focused on the mission ahead to bother with an explanation.

The three began to wonder about, all wide-eyed and amazed.

The room was large and some cross between hexagonal and a dome in shape. The three humans were surprised to see that it didn't look all that different from the Doctor's. Large metals arcs reached up from the floor and reached both into the center and to the outer wall. Red and white lights illuminated its dark interior while matching thin, winding shapes brightened the room underfoot.

O was the first to leap up to the center platform.

"Excellent! Or... well...."

As O reached the controls, he hesitated.

"What is it?" Yaz asked.

"I thought we were in a rush!" Ryan noted.

"We are!" O bit back, but his enthusiasm was quickly fading, "I- It's funny really, uh, these controls are different. I... don't know how to fly it."

"I doubt the Doc does either!" Graham cheered. "She never presses the same things. An’ she's always saying the ship is psychic anyways. Maybe just... ask it?" he shrugged.

O gave him a bewildered look. He ran his fingers and thumb along either side of his jaw for a moment before snapping his fingers.

"You might be onto something, as crazy as that sounds,” O chuckled. "I'm beginning to understand why she keeps you three around."

"Keeps-?" Yaz defended, she was quickly cut off.

"This is perfect!" O exclaimed in yet another moment of connecting the dots.

One of his hands settled onto his hip while the other gestured over to the group.

"You three can make a plan! You spend plenty of time around the Doctor, I'm sure you can think of one."

"A plan?" Ryan asked doubtfully.

"Yes! I'm more a man of... opportunity myself," he said with a facetious shrug, "Everything usually comes together in some shape or form. However, if you three can construct a plan, then this'll be no problem!"

"And you'd follow it?" Yaz asked.

"As long as it ensures the Doctor's safety, I'll do whatever you'd like."

O's voice flowed like honey. Every witty sentence genuine but hiding something deeper, just beneath the surface.

O beamed away and leapt down from the center pedestal to meet them. He was surprised he hadn't thought of this sooner. They all had interests in common, they all wanted to save the Doctor. With their plan and his instinct, they could save the Doctor and he could keep his own growing fear of losing control in check.

He offered out a sincere hand.

"I just have one condition," he added.

"Which is?" Graham asked.

O's expression softened.

"I don't want to know what the Doctor is hiding from me. I just want to move on. Promise that you'll never tell me."

For once, there was no hesitation from the three companions. They all joined in their hands onto his and O turned his hand over beneath theirs. He had been going for a handshake, but this was clearly a team decision.

He smiled at the warmth they showed him.

"Alright O, you have a deal," Yaz spoke for the small band.

O beamed in delight, his teeth showing with his wide grin.

"Really?"

"Yeah, really!" Ryan assured him.

"To save the Doc?" Graham asked.

They all withdrew their hands.

"To save the Doc," they all agreed in unison.

O dramatically leapt up to the console, ignoring the few steps leading up to it, and flipped a switch in accordance to how the Doctor piloted her own Tardis. She had once told him all her ship's controls were essentially the same, so O hoped the same rules applied to this model as well. If not, he hoped the Tardis would pick up on his desire to find her.

"Alright. Next stop, the Doctor."

To his relief, the Tardis responded. Its low lights shifted to a soft blue with stripes of yellow and purple.

The engines started up as O pulled the biggest lever he could find, hopeful it would perform the actions he wanted it to. Thankfully, the Tardis compiled.

Maybe the Doctor wanted her friends safe on Earth, but they all knew well enough by now that there wouldn’t still _be_ an Earth without the Doctor. More than that, the Doctor was their family, no matter how many times she tried to keep them at arm’s length. If there was a chance that she was in danger, they were going to have her back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, remember in a previous mini-story where the Doctor mentions that she wonders if enough pressure on O could cause him to become like the Master again? Oh yeah, that's called foreshadowing, baby.  
> He's cracking and I'm enjoying it far more than I should. I hope you are as well, I suppose? lol
> 
> This chapter is a little short- I know- but it felt like a good place to pause before a lot of big stuff goes down lol.  
> If not it would have been just a HUGE chapter so I think it's better to break it here. There will be two more chapters after this and I will PROBABLY try to upload them at the same time for reasons- but it's still in editing so I'll see how it goes. I'm also staring down finals week so I'm sorry if the end gets delayed a bit. I'm aiming for a week from now but it might be two weeks.  
> That's my heads up/apology lol
> 
> Thank you for reading and for all your wonderful support! I LOVE reading your comments and I can't believe how many people actually like this crazy project I made for myself. Thank you a thousand times over!
> 
> Remember to take care of yourself!! <3


	3. The Pretender

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yaz, Ryan, and Graham put their plan to rescue the Doctor into motion.  
> Meanwhile, O struggles to find a balance between who thinks he is and who he's pretending to be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not sure if I've mentioned it already but:  
> ' ' around text means a character is thinking it.  
> " " around text means it is spoken out loud.  
> Also a '-' between paragraphs represents a change in scene, setting, or pov  
> I hope it hasn't been confusing for anyone!

The Doctor woke up on the ground of a holding cell with a splitting headache. She raised a hand to her head and gathered her legs under her. She stood against the far corner for a long moment until the dizziness went away and her memory started coming back to her. Those creatures, the broken Tardis heart, getting clobbered. All that and now she was stuck in a military-grade cell.

She tried her sonic, just to see if she could get lucky enough to scramble the lock, but the door didn't react in the slightest. She let out a heavy breath of dismay and pressed her back to the wall.

This was simply not her day.

From the corner of her eye, a familiar color grabbed her attention. It was both a sight for sore eyes, and a troubling view. Across the hall and up the short flight of stairs to the main room, stood her Tardis. The floor around it appeared to have been made into an electrified barrier, locking the machine in place and keeping anyone from approaching her doors.

The Doctor slid down against the wall and hoped her headache would subside sometime soon. The krillitane had found her ship, but it would take them a while to get inside and even longer to figure out how to pilot it. If she could wait for an opportunity to present itself, she was confident she could steal it back. She'd been in worse situations after all.

She needed a plan-

"Good evening, my dear friends!" She heard a voice announce.

The words echoed across the barren walls so strongly that she could hear the crisp pronunciation of each word, even from the lower level. The Doctor scurried to the door and attempted to fit her head through the bars to see into the upper room to her left, but it was no use. She could do nothing more than listen.

"I'd say it's a pleasure, but then again, you haven't been the most hospitable of guests. And to think, I extended you _such_ a _warm welcome_."

There was a pause as the voice's owner tested the extent of his self-appointed authority. His words were clearly intended to belittle the krillitane, but the creatures were too dim to pick up on the manipulative tactic.

Those words... that music-like swing... the Doctor knew all too well who they belonged to but- for the moment- she was in too much shock to believe it.

"That was quite inconsiderate of you," the newcomer observed condescendingly. He pretended to be disappointed, then turned to sympathy in the blink of an eye, "But I suppose I understand, looking down on this _tiny_ world."

The sharp snap of two dress shoes crossing to the center of the room could be heard. The Doctor could only assume he was looking out of the massive window at the front of the ship.

"These... pests. Why, they can't DREAM of the capabilities you lot possess. It's no surprise you take the liberty of cleaning up the _messes_ that are their crumbling civilizations."

"Who do you think you are?" The Doctor heard the lead krillitane's raspy voice demand.

The Doctor didn't want to hear him say it. She couldn't. It wasn't possible. His watch was still on the Tardis, it had never left her possession. There was no way O could remember who he was... could he?

The Doctor covered her ears with her hands even though it was of no use. She slid to the floor. Between the dull agony of the Tardis heart calling for her to free it and the painful way O's historically soft voice was being twisted into manipulative, merciless words... the Doctor didn't know what else to do.

She wasn't sure she could take it.

"Who do I _think_ I am? I am _so glad_ you asked," each word echoed with haunting enthusiasm, "because I know _EXACTLY_ who I am. I am _the Master_... and if you ever want to use that Tardis for yourselves, well, I think you'll find... I'm your new best friend!"

This couldn't be happening. She had to still be asleep or in some twisted nightmare-ish torture. This had to be anything other than reality. She did her best to block out the sound of his unhinged laughter.

"Why would we want YOUR help?" The creatures growled, "I think we should kill you."

"Bup bup bup!" O tutted, his voice charmingly amused by his own twisted humor, "You don't want to do that. Think."

A pause for dramatic effect.

"What's more _valuable_ here?"

The Doctor could easily picture the way O might raise an eyebrow and the way he moved as if nothing could possibly bother him, even while at the center of a room filled with murderous krillitane. She could picture every little movement, as clear as day, and each infinitely more agonizing than the last.

"One? Tardis?" He continued, walking them through the process as if he was leading them through a well-rehearsed dance, "One _box_ you don't know how to open? Or the alliance of a _Time Lord_ who knows how to fly it?"

The Doctor's eyes snapped open. He couldn't! H- He wouldn't dare!

The Doctor was so absorbed by the nightmare happening around her, that she barely felt a hand reaching through the bars to tap her shoulder.

"Doctor!" A voice finally hissed loud enough to startle her.

The Doctor shook herself out of her head and looked over to find Yaz reaching for her. Graham stood right behind her, sporting a cheerful smile and holding some bulky piece of equipment in his arms.

The Doctor hurried to her feet and Yaz mirrored her movements.

Yaz rested a hand on the bars but the Doctor immediately reached through them. She caught Yaz's forearm between her own hands and held it so tightly the Doctor nearly forgot her own strength.

"What are you doing here?!" The Doctor began to scold them.

"It's alright, Doctor," Yaz explained. She pried the Doctor's death grip from her and instead took the Doctor's hands between her own.

"We have a plan," Yaz assured her calmly.

"No," the Doctor whispered loudly. "No, between the Master and the krillitane and the tardis heart- which, side bar- we have to take it with us- Actually, nevermind that. Get off the ship using whatever got you here in the first place! I'll figure it out-"

"Doctor!" Yaz's hands tightened around the Doctor's.

The time lord's eyes met hers in surprise. Yaz beamed with reassurance,

"We have a plan. What O's doing is part of the plan. It's all an act. Now, how do we get you out of there and free your Tardis?"

The Doctor blinked in surprise and found her mouth answering Yaz's request.

"This door is stronger than anything you or I can crack- but the field around my Tardis isn't nearly as high-tech as everything else on this ship. It's a makeshift solution at _best_. All you'll need is some kind of disruptor to upset the field and the reset will give you more than enough time to get inside. But that-"

"You got that, Ryan?" Graham said into some kind of communicator.

"No problem!" Ryan cheered from the other end.

"Just trust us, alright?" Yaz promised the Doctor, her eyes bright and optimistic.

The Doctor's fingers tightened around Yaz's grip. She had to explain. Before something bad happened,

"Yaz, you don't understand, I've had it too good for too long. Something always happens eventually and takes it all away from me! I- I've let myself care too much. I'm not losing any of you. I'm not letting any of you pay the price for my selfishness!"

"That's not your choice to make!" Yaz replied firmly.

The Doctor wondered if there were tears in her own eyes as she continued, disregarding Yaz's protest,

"Yes, it is! You all have to get out of here! Even if you have to leave me," the Doctor demanded. "I can't watch this happen over and over again. People giving their lives for my sake. And now- now I'm probably doomed to watch it happen for the rest of eternity. So please, get out of here while you still can! Leave me here."

Yaz pulled her hands away, twisting out of the Doctor's grip. Her stare remained firmly on the Doctor's aching expression.

"Believe it or not, some people are worth the little time you have with them. However painful the goodbye will be," Yaz smiled softly. "For all your brilliance, I think you forget that you're one of them."

Yaz turned away, her next words a powerful promise, "We'll see you later, Doctor."

The Doctor stared after her two friends as they sprinted away. Why did she always have to pick such kind, smart humans to befriend? They were making this whole self-hatred thing really difficult.

-

O couldn't say this was the best plan he'd ever been a part of, but it was going pretty smoothly so far. The krillitane certainly terrified him, with their knife-like claws and intimidatingly large wings and the way their uncaring eyes stared him down like prey. However, they were also quite birdbrained.

O could use that. If there was one thing he could do, it was out-think them.

"So why am I dressed like this?" O had asked the others back on his Tardis.

While Yaz, Ryan, and Graham were using a scan of the krillitane's ship to plan out a way to save the Doctor, they had told O to go change into whatever would make him feel "take over the world confident". O hadn't been sure what that meant, but he wasted no time finding the Tardis's wardrobe.

He was pleasantly surprised to find that, whoever this other Time Lord was; he'd had impeccable taste in fashion.

O returned wearing a gorgeous blue suit jacket with black shawl lapels and beautiful gold accents around the waist, pockets, lapels, and sleeves. Beneath it, a matching blue paisley waistcoat was buttoned over a simple button down shirt.

"We'll need you to act like a time lord," Yaz had explained. "Distracting those creatures is critical. These scans show where the Doctor is being held so while you keep the krillitane busy, Graham and I will break her out."

"Her Tardis is over here," Ryan then pointed out on the monitor, "an' those things probably have some kind of lock on it so once we have the Doctor, we'll find a way to free her Tardis."

"But it's real close to the main room where all those things are," Graham continued, "That's why we need you to keep them busy."

Yaz, Ryan, and Graham then explained that O should assume the role of another time lord they had met named 'The Master'. From what O was told, he was clever and confident and excellent at bargaining- apparently. O, while playing this role, should ask to join the krillitane in their conquests and make himself a valuable ally to them.

O had been skeptical at first, but found it became easier to act the part the more he played it.

That had been the plan, but now there was an adjustment.

Ryan was monitoring everything from O's Tardis to make sure no one had an unexpected run in with the krillitane.

Ryan's voice now chimed through a communications link to inform O that there was a slight change of plans.

"The others can't get the Doctor out so we're going to work on freeing her Tardis with the scrambling equipment from your ship. Graham says you need to convince the krillitane to let her out. Once the Tardis is ready, you both can make a run for it."

Alright, O could work with this. He'd been improvising all day. A few more lies was a small cost for safety.

"Why would you help us?' 'What do you want from us?" Multiple creatures questioned him.

O paced about the room, examining at it from every possible angle without being too obvious. He could do this.

O had heard the Doctor talk about other time lords before. He had heard the sadness in her voice when she talked about how little they valued life. How holier-than-thou they acted.

O could use that, mimic it. The Doctor would understand that he was only doing what he had to do.

He barely knew what he was saying before the words left his mouth,

"Why? What does anyone want at my age? I've seen countless civilizations rise and fall, never creating much more than the ash they become. With time, they all turn on themselves. They all lose focus. All their... petty squabbling over politics and wealth and who is allowed to do what; it keeps them from accomplishing anything of _value_. While they sit around debating policy and morality, they squander their own potential.

But not you lot! You want conquest, entertainment, always focused on _the BIG picture_!" His hands glided through the air with a rush of emotion. He was scared, so scared that his instincts to survive were kicking in again.

He let himself continue without planning a single word,

"You've already accomplished so much! So much death, so much destruction, stolen so much technology, all by your- terribly long nails," he briefly joked.

"Enough to catch a Tardis of your own, color me very _nearly_ impressed."

He paced slowly around the Doctor's Tardis from a far enough distance. There was a field around it, the one the other three had picked it up on when his Tardis had scanned the ship earlier.

"You'll need me," he said, a flirtatious tone to his voice as he finished his lap and approached the leader once more.

The krillitane simply huffed in his face.

"We already have a time lord," it grinned- at least, O assumed it was a grin, "and it talks less."

O rocked back on his heel and spun away, a hand mockingly over his chest with unrivaled elegance.

"I'm hurt!" He feigned offense.

Alright, maybe this distraction thing wouldn't be so easy. O had considered it a pretty good speech, but apparently not good enough enough to win them over just yet.

However, the game wasn't over yet. He still had plenty of moves left to make.

"You don't seem to know much about time lords."

He let the accusation linger for a moment before turning away once more.

"They can be..." O pushed a breath of air from his cheeks and out between his lips. He exaggerated his expression for extra effect, eyebrows pushing together, " _quite_ stubborn."

He began to step away, his hands tossed up as he dipped his head for a moment, pretending to yield, "Actually, you know what? That's just as well. Spend the next thousand years trying to knock down that Tardis door."

He paced himself confidently across the room, past several of the creatures.

"I COULD have led you to something FAR more valuable- but I suppose you're right," he acted as if they were losing his interest,

"You're clearly capable all on your lonesome. I'll find my entertainment elsewhere while you pursue that tedious task. Perhaps the _next_ invasive species that rolls around will want something more than a _single_ ANCIENT type 40 Tardis."

He let out a sharp breath of false-disappointment and leaned a hand against the doorway of the hall from which he had initially entered.

"That one doesn't even work properly. Why do you think it was so easy to capture?" He threw the remark over his shoulder with a roll of his eyes.

"Amatures," he huffed under his breath.

O began to walk away. He made sure his pace was constant and that he held his chin high, not showing a shred of the overwhelming fear he felt at having his back turned to the same terrifying creatures that had nearly killed him earlier that same day.

'Come on.' O begged silently. 'Take the bait. You know you want to, it's right there.'

One step... two... three... four-

"What do you mean?" One of the other creatures spoke up. Judging from the sound, it was one of the lower ranking ones- sure to cause a stir.

'How should I play this?' he considered, not stopping, 'I have the floor. No. Not yet. Not until they're all in.'

O kept walking.

Five steps... six steps-

"Wait," the leader begrudgingly called for him.

O- doing his best to maintain the believable act- stopped in place. He spared them a glance over his shoulder. Part of him wanted to run, run and never look back, but he could barely feel his own feet as they froze against the floor.

"I'm listening?!" He snapped sharply. He didn't like the sound of his voice as he did so. It didn't sound like his voice anymore, "If not, I have other times and places to be."

"You can take us to more Tardises? _Better_ Tardises?"

O briefly wondered why he was making this deal, but his own ideas connected to each other without his conscious approval.

"I can," he teased, "But you haven't been the best business partners thus far. I'm not a man of patience."

So many lies. O was having a hard time keeping track of which ones were and which weren't.

"What do you want?" The second in command asked. No- not asked- OFFERED.

They were OFFERING their agenda to him. Offering their resources. Offering their services.

' _Finally_. It's about time.'

O felt himself grin wildly.

Something inside him leapt at the offer and drew him in close. All eyes were locked on him, hanging on his every word. Finally control. _Finally_ they had relinquished control. The very idea flooded his chest with pride.

O re-entered the room and looked over the creatures' intrigued faces. It was perfect. He was the master of his surroundings, even while he lost a hold on himself.

All at once, his eyes registered the sight behind them. While all the creatures' dead eyes were focused on him, he could see the Doctor's companions, all three of them, working to free the Tardis under the cover he was providing.

O was doing that. O had all the power in this situation. O did. Not the Master. Right.

O caught hold of the metaphorical rope again before it could slip any farther through his fingers.

O was doing this. _HE_ was doing this. He had to keep his head right if he was going to get through this.

The reminder felt good but someone was missing.

The someone who would make this all feel like reality again.

It all felt so achingly familiar.

"I already told you," O scolded the krillitane. He let his eyes glance coldly over each of them. This time he remembered his own voice as he spoke, "Power."

He paused, his harsh voice lightening slightly. He had to use this power for good, for the Doctor. That was why he was here after all.

"But I am curious," he continued, his internal struggle completely hidden from view, "You have another time lord?"

O casually adjusted his sleeves and pretended this was the first time he was contemplating this fact.

"I'd quite like someone to show off our beautiful carnage to."

O wasn't sure why, but his lips curled into a wide and overpowering grin. He told himself it was the excitement of their plan unfolding perfectly.

"Is that wise?" One of the smaller krillitane questioned.

"Go get the prisoner!" Another immediately ordered it.

O's smile fell away but he tried not to show the way his blood boiled at the creature's treatment of the Doctor. It dragged the Doctor from her cell and up the stairs to the main room, barely giving her a moment to collect her legs under her.

O didn't dare to wince as it passed right by the Tardis- which the three humans were smart enough to hide behind- and threw the Doctor down between O and the krillitane leader's feet.

The Doctor quickly found her way up and stared over O. He narrowed his eyes coldly in response. Not because he was actually angry at her, nor for show. He let his eyes scan over her because she didn't look quite right.

Her eyes fell away from his and snapped to a large chunk of- what O so far had only observed to be- glowing amber messily wired up to the ship's controls.

Judging from the Doctor's expression, he concluded that it was bothering her more than any other part of this. He briefly wondered why and filed it away for later.

O reached for a small card in his pocket. He had to keep playing this part; to gain the krillitane's trust, to keep them from noticing the other three humans on board, and to keep the Doctor and himself alive. With the Doctor at risk, he didn't want to take any more chances.

The show he was putting on couldn't end yet- for everyone's sake- and his mind seemed to know exactly what to do next. He didn't like listening to it anymore, and he didn't like the things it convinced him to say, but now wasn't the time for risks.

He held the card up, between his first and second finger. He flicked it within the Doctor's view for a brief second- in a subtle attempt to warn her of its contents- before handing it to the creature to his right.

This wouldn't be pretty, but he had to make his performance believable until they could get out of there. He hoped the humans would find a way to break the Tardis out soon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone for being so patient with this update!! I split this chapter up because I felt it was too long to post all together so the next chapter will be up shortly!  
> I can't wait to hear what you think! It's been an absolute pleasure to have so many people so excited to read my writing! I hope it meets your expectations X)


	4. When The World Breaks Your Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> O is determined to keep the Doctor safe, at any cost.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IMPORTANT:  
> Warnings for blood and mentions of death. I want to mention for anyone who is sensitive to those things. It's rated T+ for a reason!

The Doctor looked over O. He looked stunning, wearing a gorgeous new suit that nearly rivaled the Master's flair for the dramatic and his dark hair carefully brushed aside.

Meanwhile the way he was acting... it bordered between the two.

She hoped it was truly all a facade like Yaz had tried to convince her it was- and yet a tiny part of her wanted him to have the memories back. All of them: the bad- but more importantly, the good. Every game the Master began and the Doctor finished. Every gentle look and meaningful glance. All their shared history, however agonizing it was. She did want him to be O, but she wished he didn't have to be one _or_ the other. The Doctor only ever wanted him to be her friend, in whatever shape and form he chose.

O's steady gaze held as the Doctor's eyes scanned over the card. They grew wide at the sight of a single string of letters and numbers written across it. O handed off the card without hesitation, but she could see something apologetic in his deep, dark eyes.

'Coordinates,' she realized. But it took her a moment to process where that unique code led. What kind of coordinates could O possibly have? Where could he have gotten them from? Where could he be sorry to take them?

The leader passed the card to another creature who was acting as the pilot.

The krillitane was already entering the coordinates as the Doctor's mind found a match for their new destination.

She hadn't been able to hear every word of their conversation so she had to work out for herself what bargaining chip O might possibly have. When the realization finally clicked into place, her hearts sank.

The man standing before her was O... he had to be... but... how could O know that location? How could O know where Gallifrey was?!

Her fam was in danger, the dying Tardis heart screaming for freedom was now arm-length away, and O.... She had too much going on to worry about who he was from moment to moment.

With an uncontainable expression of rage, she threw a forceful swing. Her fist connected with O's jaw to produce a painful crack. Whether this was the Master or O- he was responsible for this and fully deserved a solid right hook.

The Doctor had been to her burning home far too many times already. She couldn't go back there now. Not again. And especially not after she had lost her oldest friend there. She just couldn't.

O stumbled back from the force behind the punch. He managed not to fall, but the sharp blow left him more than a little disoriented. He slowly raised a hand to his jaw in surprise. He pulled back his hand to find his lip bleeding profusely where it had clashed against his teeth.

He looked up to see the Doctor shaking, tears in her eyes. Two creatures reached to restrain her but O held out a hand.

"Don't touch her!" He snapped at full force. He would NOT permit those terrible things to touch her again.

O shook his head to clear it. The Doctor's right hook was incredibly painful, but it may have been just the thing he needed to get back to the right headspace. He was getting too caught up in the thrill, blurring the line between what was necessary and what entertained him.

His eyes drifted over the Doctor's shoulder to her human friends frantically waving for his attention.

'Finally,' he half-breathed in relief.

Finally, they were ready. Finally, they could get out of here. A minute more and this game could finally be over.

He chuckled, half in exhausted relief and half to brush off the Doctor's actions.

"She's just mad because she knows how valuable what I've given you is," he forced himself to grin.

He stepped closer and reached up to the Doctor's face. He pretended it was to patronize her, but he used the moment of contact to relay information the way the Doctor had shown him a handful of times. It barely lasted all of a second. Too brief for any of the creatures to notice, but long enough to talk unobserved:

'Any moment now, the others will have your Tardis free. You need to be on it. I can handle this.' O explained.

'Not without that Tardis heart, and not without you,' the Doctor replied stubbornly.

'What's that?'

'The thing to your left, it's how they've been tracking Tardises. It's the most vulnerable part, ripped out from its protective casing. I... forgot you can't hear it.'

'Consider it done,' O promised. 'Now get out of here as soon as you get the chance. It'll be any second now.'

The connection was severed as the ship around them leapt through space at the speed of light, shaking them apart.

When the ship stopped again, the Doctor turned to the window. She expected to find her home still burning away, but... there was nothing.

"There's nothing here! What are you trying to pull?!"

The navigator threatened O.

O's caring eyes begging the Doctor to get out while he had them distracted. He flickered his eyes over to her Tardis and then back to her, demanding she leave.

The Doctor looked over his hurt expression. He clearly wanted to say more but there wasn't time.

The Doctor ran to her friends who successfully cut the power to the field around the Tardis in an instant. She unlocked the front door and ushered Yaz, Ryan, and Graham through the safety of its doorway.

O pulled out his last resort- the compression device.

He held it up to the creatures, all of which were now surrounding him. Their claws were drawn like machetes.

He held out the device and hoped a demonstration would scare them back.

He zapped the Tardis Heart and picked it up in one elegant swoop. He looked it over and tossed it across the room to the Doctor.

The Doctor caught it and put the item in her pocket but then froze, clearly torn between priorities. The Tardis and her family were a step away. She had to get them to safety.

However, before her unraveled a fear she'd harbored ever since the Master had given her his watch.

O maintained control of the room, but his Tardis was elsewhere. What were the odds he could get to it?

The Doctor knew she needed to do something but for the first time in a long time, she didn't know what.

"There's nothing here! You betrayed us!" The lead krillitane screeched deafeningly. Its jaw unhinged and widened in four different directions.

O waved a hand as if to mock its bad breath, never once appearing concerned.

"Not really _betrayed_ per se," he elaborated with a nonchalant shrug. "This IS where Gallifrey once stood. And it was FULL of Tardises, all ripe for the taking."

This only served to further infuriate the krillitane. They weren't the brightest, but they clearly liked their odds. The six of them surrounded O, seconds from gutting him open.

"What happened to it then?!" The leader hissed.

O grinned, a wide, prideful, glowing grin. The words escaped him through his clenched jaw and out his soft lips.

One last piece of the puzzle. One he somehow knew deep in his heart. One the Doctor's expression only confirmed.

"Me."

-

O wasn't sure what he was thinking. Or maybe he did.

He dug the stabilizer out of the shrinking device and held it over his head like a grenade.

He felt a blade running through his singular heart as he did so- and all the unexplainable pain that came with it.

A moment later, he heard the satisfying clatter of his demons being reduced to nothing more than marbles falling to the floor around him.

There had been an escape plan, he remembered as he collapsed. There were any number of escape plans. However, he wasn't there to simply escape.

He was there to make sure the Doctor and her friends escaped and that these creatures would never go looking for the Doctor again.

Their intimidating forms, their weapons, their power. It TERRIFIED him. Now, he had made sure they could never scare him nor the Doctor again.

He was content with that.

"No! Please, no!" The Doctor shouted as she raced to him.

The Tardis's own field had protected her and the others from the compression device's blast, and the angle O had been holding it kept himself out of its reach, but the krillitane had beaten him to the punch.

The Doctor lifted up his head with her arm and propped him up against her leg despite the blood pouring from him. The deep scarlet soaked through his blue and gold trimmed suit, turning the gold into red and the blue into a deep crimson purple. Even then, it continued to run across the floor.

He had been stabbed, torn open all the way through his chest.

"Please, no," the Doctor begged softly, "Please, I can't do this again."

"Again...." O whispered, a tiny blissful smile sliding across his face. He had been wondering for so long now.

He had been wondering ever since he found himself entrusted with a last message for the Doctor. 'Again' was finally the answer. He had believed there was another time lord, but now he knew that the Doctor's old friend had been him all along. He liked that idea, of always having been the Doctor's friend.

Whatever had happened, whatever he'd done, he hoped he had finally done some good as O. He hoped he had finally made the Doctor half as happy as he had always felt to see her.

The Doctor pressed her forehead to his as his last breath escaped him. She had hoped her presence might make it hurt less.

She didn't have time to find out.

He was gone in seconds.

'You idiot,' the Doctor thought hopelessly, 'why would you do that?!'

She began to cry. Softly at first, her tears falling onto his bloodied body. The Doctor brushed his hair out of his face and kissed his temple gently.

She could hear her companions gasping from the Tardis doors. In only a few weeks, she had convinced them to accept O as part of their group and now that they had- now that O had helped save her and keep the krillitane away from taking control of her Tardis- this was what he got.

The Master was hell personified, he had done so much damage to so many people because of what the world had done to him. She had seen him at his best, his worst, helped him recover, and watched his final descend into madness. He lied and yet, ultimately, told her the only truths that mattered.

Now he was just a person- a human, starting all over from scratch. And, like any human, trying to be better than he had been before. He kept to himself out in the middle of nowhere without understanding why, even while the Doctor knew it was to keep himself from hurting anyone else. He was Earth's dedicated 'Horizon Watcher', a protector of Earth like herself in his own way. With this last life, he tried to be something more and now... now he was gone from the Doctor's life because of her.

No. No, she wasn't going to let that happen.

The Master had promised her one life, and she had promised her own to O. For once, the Doctor wished for more time.

She didn't care what it cost.

She wasn't about to sit there and cry and feel him grow cold in her arms. She refused to accept that she would have to mourn him. She refused to think about where to bury him. She refused to think of what would happen when she locked herself away in her Tardis to hold his watch and talk to it and ask him if there was anything more she should have done.

Of course the pain that followed was worth the many smiles on his face- but their story couldn't be over so soon.

They had both done terrible things. The Doctor was already well aware that neither of them deserved a happy ending. She knew it with every beat of her now lonely hearts and every tear her eyes had ever shed over the loss of a loved one.

She was destined to live each lonely life after the next forever, just trying to make it through one day at a time, for eternity. And while she pushed on, her most trusted partner had been reduced to this. To a brilliant mind in a fragile form because the weight of his world had shattered him beyond compare.

They wouldn't get a happy ending- but she wasn't about to let O have a sad one either. One that ended with anger and fear and confusion, all for her.

Not today. Not as long as she was there.

"Doctor! You're...."

"You're doing that thing again!"

"Doctor, are you hurt?"

Her companions exclaimed.

The Doctor spared them a tearful smile.

"Stay back. Stay in the Tardis."

Without a word more, she turned to O's unmoving body.

Even if she wanted to explain things to them, she barely had a clue what she was doing. She only knew that she had to focus.

The Doctor felt her skin begin to burn, her hearts race. Her fingers tingled as she reached down to O's injury. His blood drenched her hands as she pushed them under the torn fabric of O's jacket and the red flooded over her fingers.

It wasn't right- but then again, none of this was.

It wasn't right for the Master to do this for her, it wasn't right for them to be happy. It was all messy and wrong and completely unjustifiable.

But the Doctor didn't care. As long as she was breathing, here and now, she would do whatever it took to save him.

She could feel a power she still didn't understand course through her. Funny enough, it was only because of the Master that she had learned about this confusing ability. He would laugh about it if he knew she was using it for his sake. Or maybe he would hate it. Probably both.

The Doctor tried to focus it. It hurt and burned her up as the energy rerouted from her own cells to O's body. It burned like a fire from inside her chest and through her veins. In seconds, it began to escape her grasp to destroy the room around her. The force of it sent raw, uncontrollable energy racing through the room. The Tardis's own external shields protected the three humans who ducked behind its door for safety.

Other than her, O, and her Tardis, the room around them began to creak and warp until the pressure became so great the metal walls began to melt. The ship's alarms screamed in warning as it slowly broke open from the chaos happening inside it, and yet the Doctor never hesitated for a moment.

She kept going even as she began to lose consciousness. She kept going until she felt O's chest rise as he drew a breath into his repaired lungs beneath the Doctor's hands and until the cut she had caused on his lips began to heal.

"What are you doing?" O asked, weak and disoriented.

His eyes opened slowly, as if he had been nothing more than asleep.

O sat up and the Doctor pulled her hands away from his chest. She had to remember how to turn it off. She hoped she could turn it off. She quite liked this regeneration and she'd hate to have to leave it so soon. She would happily die for O, but she _strongly_ preferred not to.

"How are you- how am I-" O briefly ran his hands over himself to find everything in place.

His wide brown eyes then focused on the Doctor, who was still glowing like the sun. He was terrified and amazed in all the best ways.

"Doctor, it's okay," he promised her softly. O reached his hands for the Doctor's face but her skin stung him. He sharply pulled his hands back with a startled noise. She felt like fire and her regenerative energy burnt his fingertips from a single touch.

Yet as he looked over the injury, he found his burnt hands instantly healing themselves.

Upon this discovery, he took it upon himself to take her face in her hands, despite the searing pain that accompanied it. He tightened his jaw shut and pushed through his grimace as he tried to remember how the Doctor connected their minds.

O felt her presence as it clicked into place and stepped across the well-worn path. He was immediately washed over with images of... himself. Except they weren't him, for he was wearing an outfit he had never seen before and performing actions he couldn't remember doing. He saw them as they passed him by, like snow in a blizzard or ash from a wildfire, all originating from her figure in the distance.

O fought upwind, through the countless glimpses of places and times the Doctor could see him as that he simply couldn't remember. They flurried around him like old photographs caught in the storm, memories of the people they had once been.

He had always wondered what pieces he was missing. Now it was plain to see. He had once been like her- except he hadn't been very kind. In every clip he looked hurt, scared, broken, vengeful.

Despite his curiosity, that wasn't who he was anymore. He had to remember that if he was going to get them both out of this.

'You have to come back to reality!' He begged her. He persisted against the pushback of a raging storm. He saw messages this other version of him had left as though they were through the Doctor's eyes. He felt the Doctor's grief at their contents wash over him as he grew closer to her.

There was... so much of it. So much loss, so much sadness, so much fear of the grief that would lay ahead. She was always so cheerful and yet all this agony was buried just under its surface. How could she bear it?

He felt himself grow tired. The weight of it all was crushing him. What was her trick? How could she stand it?

Just when he thought it would overwhelm him, he felt something new.

He felt hope.

Hope as she saw him through her eyes. As he saw the first time she had come to his house and addressed him- truly- as O. The first time they fell asleep watching tv together. The first time they spent the day at a nearby town and O had lost track of her, the day she had made him the bracelet.

That was the kindness he needed and always remembered in the most difficult of times. A physical representation of a memory that was simple but oh so personal. It was the first time he had realized that her affection was genuine and unconditional.

Now he realized that it had always been, through all the terrible things he had done, because she was still here with him. How... h-how could he have forgotten that? How could he forget that even if she was stronger and destined to outlive him, that she would love him anyways?

It sparked something new and powerful inside him that helped him fight through the whirlwind until he reached her small figure curled up atop the hill, terrified and out of control.

He kneeled down and hugged her.

"Doctor, I know how you feel," he told her deeply and directly.

"I know you're scared of yourself! You're scared of what you've done- because whether you remember it or not, you were the one who did it- and it's made you terrified of messing up again. You're scared of caring too much because you know- one day, inevitably- you'll lose it."

O could feel tears filling his eyes, "Doctor, that's my life. I was someone else who did unimaginable things... but _you_ gave me a chance. Not only to be better, but to _WANT_ to be better. If you get lucky enough to get another chance you have to take it because... well... think of everyone you've lost! Aren't you better off to have known them and lost them than to have never known any of them at all? Life is just one moment at a time. Even _you_ can't predict what the next one will be, so please- _let yourself be in this one_."

O pulled away as he felt something shift, deep within the Doctor's mind.

O opened his eyes back in the real world and watched as the Doctor's overwhelming power began to subside. The golden color faded from her complexion and drained from her eyes until she could see him properly again.

"Oh! Hello, O!" She chuckled weakly. A nervous smile tugged at her lips.

O found his footing and pulled her into a heartfelt hug. The Doctor wrapped her arms protectively around him in response.

"Thank you," she told him wholeheartedly and somewhat exhausted.

"I should be thanking you!" He reminded her. He began to pull away, but her arms tightened around him. O chuckled and complied for a little while longer. She was far stronger than him anyhow. He probably couldn't get away if he tried.

"Your friends will be waiting," he reminded her gently after another minute or so.

The Doctor eventually pulled away but nearly tripped over her own feet before she made it a single step. O caught her hand and carefully pulled her arm over his shoulders. He gently helped her to her ship.

The Doctor seemed so drained, O was surprised she was still conscious at all. The more likely conclusion was that she was just too stubborn to rest. She never did change, not really, not to him.

He smiled. He rather liked that idea.

"Doctor!" Her other friends greeted her energetically as the pair entered the Tardis.

"What WAS that?!" Ryan asked, awestruck.

"We know you don't like questions but you _have_ to tell us!" Graham added.

"That was so cool!"

"O, you didn't stick to the plan!"

"But we'll let it slide-"

"Yeah, 'course we will. Everyone's fine, yeah?"

The Doctor pulled away from O as she reached the console. She used it to steady herself as she regained her strength,

"O, where's your Tardis?" She asked.

"Two floors up, near the rear of the ship," O quickly responded.

He found a nice spot to lean against one of the crystal-like structures. He crossed his arms and tossed one leg over the other, ready to move at the drop of a hat- should the Doctor require his assistance.

"I'll tether it back to Earth," the Doctor noted.

The Doctor pulled the small stone from her coat pocket and held it up to the light.

"Can you return this to normal size?"

"I'll need to build a new version of my device, but in time, yes," O returned serve.

The Doctor smiled and set the item in one of the little notches on her console.

"Next stop, Earth! I can't wait. I'm going to sleep for at _least_ a week. _Then_ I'll get some custard creams for us all."

O began to meander slowly around the console as the Doctor directed the ship through time and space.

He was happy this was over. That the Doctor was safe and he could go back to how things were. But there was something... faint. Something soft that was bothering him like a neighbor with music so loud it shook the walls of his mind.

"Do you hear that?" He asked her cautiously.

"Hear what?" The Doctor asked casually, her little remaining focus locked onto piloting the ship.

"It sounds... like... your heart," O noted.

He looked over her and the console, trying to decide what it could possibly be.

"It's probably your watch," she sighed, sounding defeated.

"My what?"

"Where did you think your memories were?" She asked, her voice like splinters into his skin.

"I have no idea."

"Would you like to?" She asked flatly, her voice empty.

O wondered if it was some kind of test, but he chose the truth anyways,

"No."

"Good. I wasn't going to tell you if you asked."

O hesitated. He wondered if he dared to ask.

"Why not?"

"You told me not to."

O nodded, "Good."

There was a short lull as they all stood there, listening to the wheezing of the ship.

Suddenly, the Doctor stuck up a new conversation, somehow already fresh and renewed- as if it was a new day and nothing was wrong.

"So Sheffield. I'd fancy Sheffield. Have you ever thought of moving there, O?"

"Me? Back to England?!" O quickly realized.

"I've considered it but I always thought it would be quite the haul. Although now I suppose it wouldn't be, in a sentence," he chuckled.

"There you have it then!" The Doctor chirped.

"Have... what?" O questioned. He could tell she had made up her mind about something but he couldn't tell what exactly.

"I'll bring your ship there. It would be good to live somewhere with other humans again, wouldn't you say? And then when Yaz invites us all for tea, you'll be close by!" The Doctor cheered happily.

"Tea- hold on- I can keep the ship?" O asked in shock.

The Doctor had always dismissed the very possibility of him traveling with her, but he hadn't had the time to consider what would happen to his Tardis when this was over. If anything, _dying_ was all the more reason for her to cross with him- not let him KEEP it.

"It's your home," the Doctor shrugged, "Plus we had quite the time getting that sofa through the front door. I'd hate to think about having to move it back out."

"And that..." he looked up at the three other humans,

"That would be okay with you?"

"Of course it would! You're one of us now! We're just glad you're alright," Yaz beamed.

"Yeah man, welcome to the fam!" Ryan quipped.

O rubbed his neck for a moment, a cheerful smile overtaking him. A very real and genuine smile this time around. He clasped his hands together definitively.

"I'd... really love that."

-

Back on Earth, the Doctor found a nearby vacant lot in the neighborhood to set O's home down on. It looked a little out of place, but he was thinking about renovating it a bit anyways. Now he had all the more reason to remodel.

It's interior was a mess after being tossed around through time and space, so the group went out for lunch- per Graham's request.

O quickly changed back into something simpler that wasn't torn to shreds- a comfortable pair of jeans, a blue shirt, and a casual cream colored vest were good enough for him- and caught up with the group outside while they debated what shops were still open.

They had happened to land closer to dinnertime than lunch, but no one minded. They soon found a nice shop with an outdoor table and wonderful food.

At long last, the Doctor decided to finally share what she had learned about herself. After what had happened, she couldn't keep it a secret for much longer anyways.

She cut out certain painful memories, but she told the truth about how she was born with a regenerative healing power while other to-be-'Time Lords' exploited her abilities and used the Doctor for their own gain.

She explained that the Master had pieced it all together for her on Gallifrey, before the death particle wiped it all out for good.

She also explained that she saved O by transferring some of her energy, but that she had never known about the ability before, and had no idea if she could use it again. Or if it would even work on a normal human, so none of them should get themselves killed.

It was a serious threat, but they all had a laugh anyways.

To the Doctor's surprise, her fam took it exceptionally well and they promised her that no matter what, they would always be there to support her in the 21st century.

She knew they still had more questions, but they let many of them go whenever they noticeably upset her. She wondered if they were picking it up from O.

Speaking of O, she found that explanations were easier than ever with him there. He always knew when to wait out her explanation or when to remind her that she didn't have to answer anything that made her uncomfortable. She really appreciated having someone willing to be left in the dark if it meant the Doctor didn't have to relive through some of her worst memories.

They all parted ways long after the evening sank into night, and the Doctor walked O home through the cool night air. She watched up at the stars as they walked, welcoming the clear night and half curious where the stolen krillitane ship would end up even though she couldn't possibly see it from Earth. It would probably burn up in some distant star somewhere.

"I think you're right about this place," O admitted. "Fear was keeping me locked away in the middle of nowhere. Here, at least I'll know some people if I ever decide to stop being a hermit. Although I don't think I will," he joked.

The Doctor let out an amused breath at the suggestion, "You can do whatever you'd like. Just... don't get yourself killed. I'm not sure I can pull that trick again."

"I'll do my best," he promised, reaching out a hand for her to either reject or accept.

The Doctor took it in her own, and raised up their joined hands to get a better look at his wrist.

"You're still wearing that?" She asked, his sleeve sliding down just enough to reveal the bracelet she had made him peeking out from underneath it. The gorgeous purple gem at the center wasn't easy to miss.

"Yeah, I like it," O smiled. He pulled away just long enough to roll up both his sleeves. He then took her hand once more.

"Why?" The Doctor asked curiously.

"Because it was the product of one of those wonderful, spontaneous things you can't plan for," he grinned wistfully.

He swung their hands and looked up at the stars.

"We went into town and when we were supposed to meet up, I couldn't find you.

I started to look everywhere, but I had no idea where to begin. Maybe you had gotten roped up in some crazy adventure, or maybe you had just lost track of the time, but I didn't want to leave without you so I searched all over. And you remembered what happened?"

"You ran by the coffee shop absolutely winded," the Doctor chuckled.

"Yes," O laughed as well, "you were there, safe and sound, learning how to take rocks and scraps of wire and string and make it into something beautiful. Someone like you, someone so amazing, was just there; fascinated by something so simple, and... it was wonderful."

O looked down and blushed at nothing.

"I was annoyed at first but you told me all about the people you had talked to and the remarkable little things you discovered that everyone else overlooks every day.

And then..."

O looked down at the bracelet, "...and then you took the time to make something for me, because you wanted to, because you felt I was worth the effort."

O grinned, wide and unabashed.

"That's what it is to me. A reminder than life is so much more than the big picture. It's all the little moments in between that you can't possibly plan for and you don't even realize until suddenly you're in the moment.

And that... of _all people_ , you want to spend them with me."

"Honestly, I just couldn't sleep," the Doctor tried to say without laughing.

O burst out laughing right back, "Don't you start with that!"

"I'm glad you like it though," the Doctor added.

"Oh, _shut up_!"

"Don't tell yourself to shut up!" The Doctor retorted.

"Don't you even BEGIN with that again-" O beamed, laughing too hard to even _pretend_ to be angry.

"You like that, you'll flip when you see the ring I made you," the Doctor added under her breath.

O covered his mouth with his free hand, still laughing,

"Doctor, that's not funny-"

"I couldn't sleep so I was practicing my metal working! And I don't wear a lot of jewelry so- Don't read into it!"

"Doctor, please. You've only just _saved my life_. I'll start to think you actually like me if you're not careful."

"Don't be so dramatic." The Doctor playfully pushed her shoulder against his with a laugh.

When they reached his house, he did his best to excuse the fact that his living room looked like it had been through a tornado, but the Doctor didn't mind.

She immediately took to his bed, rolled herself up in the blankets, and fell asleep. After such a long day, she definitely earned it.

O just as quickly found his own spot.

He layed there for a long moment, thinking about the double heartbeats. They matched the double heartbeat he often heard when he layed his head on the Doctor's chest while they watched tv and- now that things were quiet- he could hear them again.

Just out of curiosity, he took his own pulse.

Oh.

Oh he was going to have to address that at some point... but now wasn't the time.

He felt the Doctor toss one arm over him as she rolled over, as if just to make sure he was there.

O locked his hand into hers.

'We have plenty of time,' he decided.

In minutes, they were both peacefully asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The End!!  
> Technically. I'm actually going to add an epilogue of sorts because I decided I don't like loose ends lol
> 
> I'll admit, this ruined me to write. I must've read it a dozen times and I still tear up X)  
> O taking them all the way out to where Gallifrey was?  
> O's blood turning his blue coat purple to mimic the Master's??  
> And O going 'That's my life!' to the Doctor!! Paralleling the Doctor's own struggle to move on from her past???? AHH  
> I put in so many subtle parallels between them as well, but that one is probably my favorite.  
> I could go on about it for hours!
> 
> But what about the doubt heartbeat O can hear?? What about the tardis heart? - I hear you ask.  
> Yes, hence the epilogue. Stay tuned.
> 
> I'm so excited to share this. I've never put so much time and effort into a fic before but I have to say, it's been incredibly rewarding!  
> I hope you enjoyed it half as much as I did!!
> 
> Thank you for taking the time to read this crazy adventure!! <3


	5. Loose Ends

It took a few days for O to rebuild the compression device.

The Doctor decided to stick around while the task was completed and brought him some rare but far more stable materials to complete the updated version. O was sure the Doctor could have rebuilt the device herself, but she didn't offer any direct help- as if she held a personal grudge against the dangerous item.

While he worked, O couldn't decide if he dared articulate what he knew they were both thinking.

When the Doctor had saved his life, O had seen more than he should have in her mind. Memories of them both in various different forms had given him a glimpse into their long shared history. For a long time, O had speculated that he had known this other time lord. Now he knew that they were one in the same.

He liked being himself and he liked the way the Doctor looked at him. Sometimes her eyes betrayed a glimpse of sadness, but they were cheerful far more of the time. O wanted to know more about who they had been, but he wasn't willing to risk ruining who he had become.

Those other versions of him- of the Master in one form or another in the Doctor's mind- had all been so broken. Their eyes were all full of fire and fear and agony without mercy.

The only hint of compassion the Master ever had was for the Doctor and now O had the item of all their affection.

O had won the prize sought after by all the Masters' schemes. HE had won the Doctor's affection right back.

Although, O now realized, both he and the Master probably had her affection all along- they had just never realized it.

They had never realized that the Doctor's love wasn't limited to one person at a time.

The last and final version of the Master had wanted death. He had been ready for it.

As far as O cared, the Master was dead.

O didn't need any part of who the Master was anymore. His fury and violence had served their purpose. He had played the role and now he didn't have any need for them anymore.

O would be a better person than any of the Master's lives. He was willing to grow, even if the cost was that his past would forever remain a mystery.

"I'm not the Master," O finally said as he worked diligently on his project.

"I could be him,-" he paused to reflect, "-if I wanted to, but I don't need to be him anymore. The Master was someone who did what he thought was necessary to maintain control over his life. To stay alive without being dragged under by the fear and anger and everything else that overwhelmed him.

I won't let myself be him anymore. I don't _need_ to be him anymore."

O let out a heavy breath of relief. It felt so good to finally say.

"Says someone who killed half a dozen krillitane this week," the Doctor smirked.

O immediately picked up on her dark humored banter.

"Hey, they killed me first! I'm not going to lose sleep over it," he chuckled, untroubled.

O wasn't ashamed to admit he had actually known exactly what he was doing when he chose to use the device. He might love the Doctor, and he might not be the Master anymore, but that didn't mean he suddenly had a 'perfect' sense of morality.

As far as O was concerned, the krillitane did nothing but cause pain and destruction. If he had let them go, they would have returned Earth sooner or later. It might have taken a day or a decade, but O was sure they would have been back eventually.

Instead- by sealing their fates in two inch tall figurines- O had ensured that wouldn't be the case. He could sleep soundly knowing that the Doctor and Earth were safe.

He had made his peace with his decision then and he was still at peace with it now.

O finished the last of the compression device and tested it out on a nearby chair with an overzealous spin. Okay, so maybe he was still a _little_ like the Master; but thousand year old habits were bound to die hard.

The item shrunk perfectly into a tiny model.

He flipped the reverse switch and aimed for it again. He hit the shrunken object perfectly and the chair returned to normal size.

"Perfect," he grinned wildly.

The Doctor pulled the tiny Tardis heart from her pocket and set it on the desk.

The broken core of a once powerful soul, now free from the selfish control of a holier-than-thou council using it for their own gain. Creatures who never bothered to consider the damage they were doing to it. In a strange way, O felt he could relate.

One zap later and the item returned to full size without any trouble.

"What will you do with it?" O asked the Doctor.

She shrugged, "Probably find a nice scrapyard and build it a new case. Enough to make it functional again anyways, get it back on its feet. Once it has some time to heal, I'm sure it will feel much better. This is already a big improvement."

She rested a hand on it, "You made quite the fuss, my friend."

O watched her with a soft smile over his lips.

"You could always..." she began.

He looked up at her when he noticed her hesitation. He waited a beat before asking,

"Always... what?"

"It would probably take a little while,-" she considered, "-I could always bring the materials back here and we could work on it together. You'd LOVE dimensional engineering."

O eagerly took the flimsy excuse to keep her around for a little while longer.

"That sounds like fun," he beamed. It really did.

There was a sudden pause and O somewhat awkwardly took the opportunity to bring up the second loose end he needed to address.

"Speaking of time."

Not really. Sort of. He had to get through this somehow,

"I... should tell you."

This was going to be a lot harder than he thought, but there was no way he could keep this hidden for long even if he wanted to.

He took a deep breath and stepped around his workspace to meet her on the other side. The large tardis core to his right continued to glow intermittently in his peripheral vision.

"When you brought me back- suffice it to say... I believe you did a bit more _damage_ than you intended," he chuckled nervously at his own sarcasm.

O held out a hand for the Doctor's own and she obliged him. He moved her fingers to his wrist and lightly held them there. O already knew what she would feel- the racing beat of two hearts.

It took the Doctor a moment to catch on, and O nervously watched her expression shift as she searched for an explanation.

"Because the human code overwrote the abilities you naturally had, my attempt to heal you must have restored your original genetic code," she mused, deep in thought.

"What... does that mean?" O speculated, "Did I simply gain the physical properties? Will I regenerate if I'm injured? Will I... How many lives will I have?"

"I... don't know!" The Doctor's expression suddenly returned to reality. He watches as her lips grew into a wide grin and her eyes widened to stare into his. Her hand slid down to take O's own hands between hers.

"Isn't that amazing?!"

O looked over her, momentarily at a loss for words, and then chortled with amazement.

"I suppose it is," O agreed, too bewildered to know what else to say.

Thankfully he didn't have to, because the Doctor already knew what it meant. It meant more time for them both, more time together and more time for O to get this whole 'good person' thing right. Her strong arms pulled him into a loving- if not crushing- hug, as if she couldn't possibly hold him close enough.

O was too shaken to respond for a moment, but the Doctor's touch steadied him back to reality. He returned the gesture and pulled her impossibly closer.

It all felt unreal.

The Doctor was amazing and eternal and always putting herself in danger for others. Meanwhile, O easily got overzealous and tunnel-visioned and prefered to be solitary rather than altruistic. And she loved him anyways.

It was ridiculous and impractical but by all the stars he was so thankful.

They would only have so much time, he knew. The moment she left again to go be the Doctor the universe needed would hurt so much. But it was all worth it to be with her.

After everything... he'd finally won.

His prize was everything he hadn't known he wanted.

It was a happy ending neither of them could justify, but it was their happy ending all the same.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> <3<3<3
> 
> Alright, there you go!!  
> I obviously can't thank you all enough but I have to do it at least once more!! I would have never continued this series without all your kind words and I appreciate you all so much!! :D
> 
> I don't think I'll officially continue this series but I have really enjoyed writing O so if I ever make a few dabbles I'll probably make a second collection of one-shots and put them there or something. And I'd link it to this collection of course.  
> For example, I've been messing around with a couple things like the fact that O's house is a functioning tardis, or the fact that the Doctor and O now have this 3rd tardis to take care of, or I was thinking about bringing in Jenny from The Doctor's Daughter' because if the Doctor is genetically immortal then I mean, yunno, there's no reason Jenny wouldn't be. Okay, I actually have several ideas on how to continue this but no promises.  
> Sorry, for a writer I love to ramble.  
>   
> Anyways, I really hope you enjoyed this because I've had a great time!!  
> I love you all, keep yourself safe!! <3

**Author's Note:**

> I have been WAITING to write O struggling w his identity since I started this madness.  
> Please sign in and kudos so the ao3 update will count your read! It would really mean a lot to me.  
> And don't be shy to comment! I LOVE getting comments and it really fuels me to keep working on projects like this!!  
> Most importantly: check back in a week or so for the next chapter!!  
> Love you all <3 Have a great day!


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